15 Dec (45)

IMAGE: Scribe’s VideoLog 03 Aug (43) 2016

IMAGE: Scribe’s VideoLog 03 Aug (43) 2016

IMG_6797.jpeg

08:29 Scribe: so, how many times have I been harassed? How many times has my 4+ year journey been spun for commercial purposes? - and here I sit. No answer. All my hard work, precious time, creative juices - squeezed… packaging them under a label, and the masses are drinking them in. NO ANSWER.

I understand the benefits of being discovered.

But I haven’t been.

i didn’t want to be - except for “yes! It is telepathy. Or no it isn’t”

that peace of mind that I wanted 4 years ago?

still don’t have it.

the constant struggle I face to stay balanced EVERY DAY because if no one is coming forward? It must mean I’m mentally unstable, right? Some mental disorder. My story so far-fetched… who would believe it’s telepathy?

not even I can.

and that’s my whole point.

So, yes, I can APPRECIATE the head-nods: this was a cool concept! So was that one.

Silence.

Absence.

i am in solitary confinement in a mental ward someone ELSE has the keys to.

And I cannot do anything about it.

I reflect on my outbursts : those moments when I scream out : THIS IS WHAT I HAVE TO DEAL WITH!

The last thing I want to do is harass …

But no one is coming forward.

i tried multiple times - politely, cordially, privately - to get an answer.

Out of curiosity, I read another set of user agreement terms (I do this sometimes…)

Scribe: reading these Instagram Community Use Terms helped me define - in yet a different way - what I’ve been going through for the past 4+ years & there isn’t a damn thing I can do about it.

Again, I recognize there might be GOOD to come out of my experience …

However, on the flip side:

I HAVE BEEN HARRASSED. Repeatedly.

08:33 I constantly see what I deem as stolen intellectual property.

Each time I see a resemblance - The muse in me, yes, smiles. That is always my first reaction.

There is an ugly side, though. It’s like a delayed response and some trigger sets me off … and I realize

No one is here to tell me anything.

Am I being taken advantage of?

you see? I have sacrificed so much just to put that content out there.

and I get upset.

It’s all how you frame it, right?

NO ONE has come forward … and what does that silence & absence remind me?

How would anyone feel - what would they think? - when for years their honest work & creativity (authentic content) … is disseminated to the masses - not by them … but by others who have never reached out to you.

not a single word.

08:33 Scribe: I’m not going to spend the time to track down when I first posted about NEGATIVITY.

08:55

V(oice)- a piece of advice?

don’t ever think you don’t matter to me … despite what it may look like or seem to be. Ok?

Scribe: I’m just reflecting on something for FUTURE DISCUSSION

V- I know

Scribe: because, lord knows, it ain’t being heard now. I’m the batshit lady who’s making up this crazy story … whose truth is nonsense

v- I know

Scribe: I know my place right now … and I am still going to raise hell. It isn’t right. My rule of thumb is this : if I wouldn’t want something like this to happen to someone else ? Then it shouldn’t be happening to me.

it happens every day : people get inspiration from some source and they spin it in their own way.

What if it keeps happening?

what if your life / work life doesn’t reflect their potential (their concepts/projects that others seem to be successful for AFTER you had already spent 1000s of hours on your own endeavor? Is it stolen intellectual property? Or just a coincidence - a creative adjacency?

So many artists who

”don’t have their life in order”

it doesn’t mean they’re worthless

it doesn’t mean they didn’t contribute something valuable

i don’t know how I should feel.

How should I interpret the fact that I live alone with all this KNOWING?

09:05 v- be proud of what you’ve done

Scribe: if in the physical world I saw someone walking out of my place with my possessions day in and day out … no one to tell me why they are taking my shit

v- you would be upset

09:06 Scribe: and there is nothing I can do about it … I just have to keep watching them take my shit and there’s not a friend or family member in sight - or anyone to make things right.

09:08 post

09:09 post pushed to Twitter

09:18 Scribe: I know those people taking my shit may just be moving it somewhere safe … but no one talked to me

v- no one asked your permission

09:19 Scribe: THAT is what is wrong.

My point still stands.

09:21 Scribe: I wish it were that simple. OBVIOUSLY something is holding someone back. They want to face me but can’t for whatever reason.

I can understand.

v- it doesn’t make it any easier.

Scribe: you have EVERYTHING I have put out into the world - word for word -

v- sign and symbol, I know

Scribe: (shakes her head) I do not have clarity. I am like everyone else having to view things from an outsider’s perspective - except I have a few more pieces to the puzzle than they do.

v- a lot more

09:24

09:25 V- will you include what you are referring to?

Scribe: again, the muse smiled initially: she recognizes

v- her handiwork .. spun in a different way by someone else … that will have far more reach

Scribe- than she could ever manage on her own. Understood.

IMAGE: Scribe 17 June (43) || 2016

IMAGE: Scribe 17 June (43) || 2016

IMAGE:  Travelers  S03E01 cue 02:28

IMAGE: Travelers S03E01 cue 02:28

09:28 Scribe: most people probably wouldn’t catch it … but a creator

v- who originally thought of the concept does

Scribe: you know I am overall ok with it

v- it just does not reflect who you are today / with nothing to show for it

Scribe: I of all people know there are many ways to frame success

v- too well, I know

09:30

[ loving mindchat ]

”Honey Badger don’t care…”

09:40 [ WARNING: R-rated language in this illustrative video ]