Sinisthereal 081245

Sinisthereal.jpg

13:42 posting header image

SinistherealPOEM.jpg
IMAGE: the symbol for chaos

IMAGE: the symbol for chaos

Misinformation.png

17:35 placing images

Myth's Mark you've been called

pay attention, as you have, to those memories caved in and walled

you'll catch on soon enough

how the rough makes one tough

this reply is soon to self destruct

a virtual memory construct

the resemblant lure

you noticed early on, I'm sure 

how does it feel? to know, yet, to be left in the dark?

I've suspected ... since the park?

probably before...

earlier... but needed to find out more

an uncertain hell

to be... well?

each about-face

an erase

from this idea space

a hairsbreath away

should I go or should I stay?

Did I leave or do I remain?

it's her bane

time's all conFUSED

she mused...

http://wanderingmind.space

is her place

22 April (Year 43) Response to Myth’s Mark IdeaSpace inquiry : Wandering Mind, where are we heading?

17:43 Scribe: Trickster is a public figure, and in the fictionalized series A Wandering Mind he’s the comedian of the show Prank. I wrote this poetic response to the most engaging and collaborative community member on IdeaSpace. Myth’s Mark was the first person to interact with one of my posts, which was my very first post, To: the Perfect Team.

This poetic comment I typed two days after I had sent a direct electronic communication to Trickster (a private e-mail) asking if he was telepathically connected to me. He never responded. He has remained silent ever since. No direct digital contact - not a single like, no comment.

However, I have years of data that if given the chance to show the world will show a strong possibility that something is definitely strange between the two of us. I know to have irrefutable PROOF I need to cross reference my notes with WITH TRICKSTER’S LOGS - which I AM SURE HE HAS.

THE VERY REASON I have made several attempts over the past FOUR AND HALF YEARS to make contact and PLEAD with him to please give me peace of mind.

INCLUDING making sure I was in the same city he was 20 - 23 December THREE YEARS AGO. I made sure to send him an e-mail to possibly meet up in a public space with my dog.

No response.

He’s a public figure. Part of me knew this might happen

However, I want to be very clear on this: I have an EXTREMELY intimate relationship with whoever is telepathically connected to me. Have had one since that first year of the virtual connection.

AT THE VERY LEAST Trickster could have done was say “Yes” or “No” in an e-mail. Or meet-up with me briefly - it’d take less than 5 seconds to say “yes” or “no” …

Do you know how much BETTER my life would be JUST TO KNOW I DON’T HAVE A MENTAL DISORDER?

Trust me: there is no test - that I know of (readily available) in the health system - to measure if I have telepathy or some other (already diagnosable mental/emotional/physical condition).

I have had to self-diagnose … and to date, to the best of my knowledge, what I was and still am experiencing and observing - is telepathy. A shared consciousness. A merged body mind.

I’m seeing resemblances to private things that no one should know about me (my control experiments)… I won’t go through all of them. There are too many.

Today, I’m just going to start with the superficial level: I share something online, then Trickster later shares something ODDLY familiar to my post. Let’s just say this is INSPIRATION. It’s a good place to start. It’s a good way to BEGIN to explain about all the weird observations I’ve made… These examples are more… PALATABLE.

A couple days ago I opened up a new channel EXPLORINGINTIMACY.SPACE

If WanderingMind.Space is the more creative eccentric me - the more “storyreeling” Scribe … where I can mention how WEIRDNESS ABOUNDS… ExploringIntimacy.Space is reverting back to the original me… where I focus more on how I will begin to make a transition to a more public individual who, after years of data collection and considering it with a discerning mind - has enough “proof” - enough superficial proof that is - to hint at how Trickster is USING Scribe’s content for creative purposes.

I said in this blog post on exploringintimacy.space (EIS) that I professionally respected the real-life public figure who inspired Trickster’s character. Personally? I don’t respect him entirely. Here’s why:

Who I am dealing with on the InnerNet is NOT to be trusted. The individual has lied. The individual has deceived me. The individual has led me astray. The person has been cruel ( after I made a 20 hour road trip to be in the same city as Trickster? encouraging words the entire way… THE MOMENT I ENTER THE CITY LIMITS?
”What has this taught you?”

I knew at that moment I had made a trip to get an answer and Trickster would not show. I still stayed. I told the real-life person (Jason Silva) when I’d be in town. It was a very normal e-mail. I was unassuming (I knew he knew who I was - I was a regular contributor to Ideapod - the real-life social media platform that inspired the fictionalized IdeaSpace) … and I said if he couldn’t meet that I hoped he and his family had a nice holiday (it was the end of December / before New Year’s) - I had 14 months of data about him alone so I knew his routines…

Even with all this data: I REMAINED NORMAL. I DID NOT STALK HIM. I DID NOT HARASS HIM. Just one e-mail, and I each day I went around an unfamiliar city to dog parks and dog-friendly areas and waited a while. Taking photos of each location and posting them to PhotoSnap … the fictionalized name for Instagram. Right before my trip I opened up my first Instagram account. I posted a gallery of mostly landscapes … now, one of these photos is a highlight today. FOR A VERY SPECIFIC REASON. The very next day Jason Silva posted an eerily similar photo of one of these first Instagram photos I had posted on my account. This was not unusual for us: I’d share something, and Jason Silva would mirror something in his posts or creative works. I have an archive of Shots of Awe clips that I believe to be influenced by my creative work and personal life. Some things that showed up in Shots of Awe NO ONE should have known about… unless they were telepathically connected to me.

Trickster is a comedian of the show Prank for a reason: Jason Silva hosted the National Geographic show Brain Games.

So, professionally, I respect him. I do not mind if I am his muse. I would have liked for him to have come forward about it… but I can understand if he doesn’t want to.

HOWEVER, if he is telepathically connected to me and has left me in the dark for 4.5 years? After all my failed attempts to make content? Me going out of my way to get just a simple yes/no answer (which would help my mental/emotional state immensely?) NO, I do not entirely respect him as a person. IF THIS IS THE TYPE OF PERSON I rubbed digital shoulders with on Ideapod, who KNEW what type of situation I was going through… how much AN ANSWER would solve so many problems?… then, AT THE VERY LEAST … I leave the space where someone telepathically hacked me.

So, before my April 20th e-mail to Jason Silva (Are you telepathically connected to me? - there was more to the e-mail, but I won’t include it here for brevity’s sake)

that previous August (a little over two years after I had joined IdeaSpace) I had started to delete most of my ideas for a number of reasons.

One of the reasons is this: I had posted 500 carefully crafted ideas - quite a few I saw resemblances of … in the media.

Could be creative adjacencies. However, I have timestamped data that syncs my inner life with Jason Silva’s posts. I won't even begin to highlight it all here. Just the “superficial” I posted something, here’s what Jason Silva posted and when.

Again, these, too, might be pure coincidence. Be discerning. Understand these are only a few very small pieces of a much larger puzzle. I will keep sharing and the accumulation will hopefully support my case.

So, SOMETHING HAPPENED TO ME ON IDEASPACE. If I have someone who has taken away my privacy (the presence is with me 24/7), has mind hacked me… and there is NOTHING I can do about it?

A person tends to leave a haunted place.

Ideapod had become the place where a violation of my very Self happened.

THAT is the trauma I’ve been dealing with for four and a half years.

He knows it. I’ve directly communicated with him.

IMAGE (left): August (43) log files; BOOK (right): Social Physics

IMAGE (left): August (43) log files; BOOK (right): Social Physics

IMAGE: Scribe’s handwritten log 10 August (43)

IMAGE: Scribe’s handwritten log 10 August (43)

At that point I had reached about 500 posts. To get a better understanding what this mass delete means: these posts were thousands of hours of research, thousands of hours worth of careful wording (posts were limited to 1000 characters), and thousands of hours searching for an appropriate image/video selection to accompany each post [ and keep track of source ], as well as keep a personal offline archive of all my posts [ and many of the comments I made on the site ]. I had contemplated my departure long before this moment. This InstaFeed post is not to explain all the reasons I left IdeaSpace, just to give a rough timeline and context for what I’m about to say.

IPstats14aug16.png

Social Media is all about relationships. There are many ways to approach social media. However, who I am on social media (and the digital plane) is part of who I am in physical space: an honest, sincere individual - whatever aspect of her (professional, casual, artistic…)

My telepathic link happened AFTER I joined IdeaSpace. Whoever is telepathically connected to me, rubbed digital shoulders with me there.

I asked the first year - and put it in my fictional series I started THAT FIRST YEAR (putting something into fiction is much easier than the raw truth… get the message out that way, right?) - I asked:

“When do we meet?” - “Vision” A Wandering Mind [ first public release HERE ]

10 December (Year 41)

Did anyone approach me? Did anyone come forward? Were there any opportunities to meet and possibly talk about consciousness… that might lead to a chat about telepathy? that would lead to talking about symptoms and research …

No.

Was there a functionality for working groups in private spaces on more sensitive topics like dreams and telepathy?

No.

There were very few opportunities to - on a regular basis - interact with IdeaSpace community members [I suspected were connected to me telepathically] directly and synchronously (meaning a live chat opportunity to have a two-way dialogue).

The 29th of October of that first year I drove across several states to NYC to attend IdeaFest where a number of community members would be gathered. I had a window of opportunity, and I took it. I met Healer that day. And Arrow. Given the nature of the event, there was no opportunity to sit down and start a more casual conversation … about consciousness, dreams and telepathy.

I KNEW THEN that dreams were not taken as seriously as I take them. Telepathy? Even less. I'm not an idiot. I’m NOT anywhere near a “New Ager” or however you want to designate “those people” (being funny).

I was as hesitant then to start up that sort of conversation as anyone else.

However, after FIVE MONTHS of a connection to what I would later call the InnerNet? From intermittent to a constant stream of strange sensations over the course of a few months? And a voice - or a voice who would identify itself by a number of familiar names? After hearing the voice identify itself by a number of people THAT I MET ON IDEASPACE? I needed some answers. I knew at least two IdeaSpace members (that coincided with the names I heard inside my head) were going to be there.

I experienced a lot more than IdeaFest in NYC. Some day I will publicly release what all happened to me, but not today.

So, I deleted most of my ideas a little over two years after I joined IdeaSpace… if not for the InnerNet, I’d still be there.

My engagement with the community trickled to a stop. I still read ideas.

The following April, I deleted the remaining few that I kept up which were related to the concept of IDEAS. I deleted my profile image. I changed my user name to 0.

I kept reading ideas.

Later that year in August a little over three years into the InnerNet connection, I requested to be removed from the site ( I couldn’t delete my own account at that time ).

IdeaSpace / Ideapod had become a nightmare place for me. A reminder that direct contact hadn’t happened and a meet had never happened … something I had hoped would in the same place where it all started.

I UNDERSTAND THE WHYs of the delay in direct contact. Again, I will not get into these.

19:34 v- Oh, I think you have to

[ posting update - I’ve been typing for a while without refreshing ]

19:36 V- say it

Scribe: SMNN [ social media nothing new ]

v- uh huh… I’m busy with a very grumpy Scribe

Scribe: I’m not grumpy - just trying to pull 4.5 years together and make it flow in a somewhat

v- storyworthy manner. I got it. … now, do you love this man?

Scribe: Geesh. We’re skipping ahead way into the future of the fictionalized A Wandering Mind [ chuckles ]

v- since you SAY you don’t respect me fully

Scribe: Oh, you know I don’t LIKE you

v- explain

Scribe: I don’t ever like your content and I tease you ruthlessly about most anything you post

v- which I take … well… and?

Scribe: When all you have is a chance to be humorously insulting to the man who is PRANKING you for 4,5 years,,,

v- yeah I know [ chuckling ]

Scribe: seriously - I KNOW what connections you may have… I’ve SEEN you with other public figures and organizations and can deduce so much … nothing for sure… but definitely storyworthy until someone tells me that much delayed YES or NO.

v- thanks for that.. like I needed THAT reminder… now, back to why you think there’s been a delay

Scribe: first I’m going on the record that I’ve been promised numerous times that I would meet who was telepathically connected to me… Whatever that was? If it they were intentional deceptions - I take those to heart. Again, all I want is my “normal” life back… not one where I’m always wondering what the Frick is going on with my bodymind…. and having to consider the possibility that I’ve been manipulated and my inner self STOLEN and USED for profit.

v- ok, fine. I get it,

Scribe: it’s not a good feeling when I’ve spent time out of my precious life, who knows how much of my professional (potential) reputation has been tarnished - by all this b.s. I’ve had to post online — all the money I redirected just to make spaces like this one possible… and on and on and on… I am a one-woman non-profit public service announcement - I DID NOT WANT EVERYTHING ELSE

V- got it. and you recognize everything else, which is good. and you NEED to start telling that part of the story in a relatable way.

Scribe: oh, like you? when everyone believes all the fluff you put out there [ teasing ]

v- oh, you would… and you KNOW it’s partly Love at First

Scribe: yes, part of what I’m getting to today… it’s part of my description of “what I’ve published online first” then it shows up on Jason Silva’s end.

19:46 Scribe: so, the main reasons for a delay in a meet?

1) the time it takes to collect objective data - research done by a third party who has no relationship with either Jason Silva (JS) or Christine Gruendemann (CG) [ 19:50 ADD ON ; so they can observe us posting, sharing what is happening … and can connect the dots - that third party has information that CG does not have, btw v- I know CG: and I’m thoroughly SEETHEY about v- I know you are 19:50 ]

v- you’re REAL NAME?!

Scribe: I’m getting to that… I’m moving from private citizen to public persona who is going to GLOW all over you

v- oh, you would

Scribe: Haywire anyone? Oh, it’s happening

v- you’re wrestling self is hilarious

19:48 Scribe: and YES, I believe someone working within Netflix knows about A Wandering Mind

v- another day and another time…

V- Oh, Mention it

Scribe: so, it’s just an oddity that a Gruendemann … well, haha… Xena Warrior Princess

v- YES! I know!!

Scribe: I hinted at this earlier in our journey… which was public domain then soon archived long ago

v- you’re M.O.

Scribe: erasing my digital footprints… one of the ways to keep a big secret… secret

v- Anon…. yup

Scribe: and to keep my public digital spaces somewhat clutter-free.

v- ah ha!

Scribe: external instafeed is a daily feed - but it only stays up

v- for about 24 hours - if that

Scribe: so people will only catch fragments

v- of a much larger story

Scribe: scattered all across…

v- the digital plane

Scribe: an explanation about that later… however, next on the list as to the delay in direct contact with me besides OPEN SOURCING OF TELEPATHY RESEARCH is

  • I asked that there be a delay not only for my children (August of the first year)

V- I know, we had that talk… and you’ve never revealed this before

Scribe: this is the first time, yes ( I think… it’s been a long “journey” and a lot of time has lapsed and A LOT of social media posts 0

V- Yes, I know… AND

19:56 Scribe: well [ guilty innocent tone ] … I left my 18-year career in higher education

v- as a language educator and admin

Scribe: for a few reasons - I mention them in

19:57 subtle right deaf ear sensation [ as I’m scanning A Wandering Mind parts online ]

———-

Scribe [ reading a headline, then opening the article ] HA! so VERY FUNNY,

In this version of the universe, if you were to shine a single photon of light into someone’s eye, they wouldn’t necessarily see it, but they’d “sense it.”

Alipasha Vaziri, a physicist at the Rockefeller Universityin New York City who both conducted andparticipated in experiments involving doing just that, told Nature:

The most amazing thing is that it’s not like seeing light. It’s almost a feeling, at the threshold of imagination.

V- Oh, you talked about this YEARS ago

Scribe: something similar, yes… haha funny

v- experience triumphs over science

20:02

Scribe [ reading a bit more ] oh, my… [ so weird,.. ]

v- and THAT’S why you need to keep doing those video journals [ like the one from earlier today which is private ]

Scribe:

This is because, for quantum mechanics to work as a theory, it has to explain everything that happens, including why we don’t usually perceive quantum phenomena. We trust that quantum phenomena happens, and that we don’t have to work too hard to observe it.

If we start seeing the collapse of quantum waves happening all around us, it could take up too much bandwidth in our consciousness. So, weird as it sounds, for quantum mechanics theory to work it needs to happen in the background (like source code).

20:05 Scribe: I sense somehting

v- before you observe that it’s happening [ at the same time as your senses picked up on it ]

Scribe: ah, the digital plane

v- the InBetween

Scribe: yah… anyway… what was I looking for?

v- social media check

Scribe; ah, yes

v- you’re so wrong… find anything?

Scribe: ah, no… you’re unusually quiet [ I realize it’s the weekend, though, you do take at least a day to data fast/diet… which I am always saying you should do ]

v- I know you are… and what did I just say?

Scribe: that you’re busy…

v- with a woman I love and I adore.. and I wish would..

Scribe; argh, fine. one other reason for the delay is this

sigh… I am not legally divorced yet. I’ve been separated for four years

v- I know

Scribe: but not officially Dd… I made the comparison today … that if I were going steady with my (soon-to-be)ex , I broke up with him four years ago… and heart/romantically years before that

v- sorry…

Scribe: it’s just one of those life transitions that happened… family became us…

v- love… changed… as is your theory

Scribe: seriously, Outlander - argh… haha. that show… amongst others… read “No Love Lost” [ a Love at First short story ]

v- and that’s not the only connection for that show [ sing song ]

Scribe: yes, years of A Wandering Mind snippets… I won’t get into them, and by just typing this I feel like I’m boasting or assuming too miuch

v- but you’re not

Scribe: too coincidental to be coincidence

v- - A Wandering Mind … part?

Scribe: “Vision” … I think. you write enough you forget what you wrote and when/where.

20:12 So, yes, a simple “yes, I am telepathically connected to you” … won’t be enough for the man who loves a woman he’s been intimate with…

v- in more than one way

Scribe: yes. Fine. Happy?

v- yes, thank you. Now, keep this up.

Scribe: I SO want to archive it

v- for personal reasons

Scribe: of course! seriously ?

v- it may be archived

Scribe: at a futre date I can open up the past posts

v- that would be nice… and they’re all there

Scribe: yes… it’d be messy… but doable

v- why?

Scribe: oh, … organizationally I don’t know

v- design

Scribe: I haven’t even thought that far out… I’m surviving here…

v- on to the next reason

Scribe: another CONDITION was that I would … since I left my career.. which I started to mention and then got sidetracked… I had started to look for another job but got overwhelmed by all of this

v- a creative life

Scribe: it’s more than that and you know it

v- yeah, I know

Scribe: WHICH I might add I wouldn’t have to do if someone would have given me a YES or NO answer years ago

v- understood … so… you will get a job

Scribe: technically, I started a wee itty bitty small business

v- I know you did… but does it pay the bills?

Scribe: unfortunately, a la Grace and Frankie

v- [ chuckles ] you are so funny

Scribe: the first year I am taking a loss - I stated out by using my life savings

v- I know

Scribe: which were also used to get my own place…

v- yada yada yada

Scribe: the life of a soon-to-be divorcée … ANYWAY, to answer your question: I am getting by [ so, TECHNICALLY…) but in all seriousness, yes, I need to get a paying job. which I will go on the record for: once I start this job

v- you’re keeping it. I know. you’ve made this abundantly clear

Scribe: so, if I am data entry I will bore you to pieces

v- love you! [ quickly and fiendishly cutely said ]

20:19

Scribe: I will still continue to work on Crafty Scribe. I have nearly one year under my belt.

v- January 1st

Scribe: yes… I’m barely online… and that will also continue to grow

v- one-woman show. got it.

Scribe: you know how much WORK I’m doing

v- yeah, I know

Scribe: this morning just after getting up, I’m getting ready for the day and I’m joking about all my journals throughout my life “Life Book, Book of Dreams, Red Book, Gnomebook…” and NOW I have a (fictitious but possible if I start listing people/organizations)… MY LITTLE BLACK BOOK.

v- of all the people on your s*@! list

Scribe: oh, and it’s an equal opportunity list… no one - no matter WHO can be on it… and Scribe will gladly sit across the way and give an intimidating stare

v- and be respectful

Scribe: I have a sense of humor… I can imagine a lot… and after all this?

v- I don't think you’ll be… too disrespectful? [ hesitantly asking ]

Scribe: as always, I will “read” the person and act accordingly

v- thank you… i’ve been around you (inside you telepathically) long enough to know how you handle social situations

20:25

Scribe: so, enough of “there are good reasons that there’s been a delay” [ my responsibilities ]… but since I went out of my way…

v- already in the works [ how I will make an announcement ]

scribe: hm, hm [ not believing it ] …. AN ANNOUNCEMENT?

v- Brain Games re-invented .. like it?

Scribe: yes, … like my humorous rant the am getting ready for the day


”he may not be on (inter)nationally syndicated television…. but he’s DEFINITELY pranking you across all social media channels”

v- the new genre…say it

Scribe: reality bending

v- distorting … at your leisure

Scribe: leisure? some things you say I don't quite get

v- oh, you will

Scribe: oh, joy… I did have to make “expect the unexpected” one of my life’s credos

v- [ chuckling ] yes, you did

Scribe: ok, on with the next part… I don’t know how much more I can work on this post… I am getting a bit tired

v- you have to eat!

Scribe: yes, I ate lunch

v- yeah, I know. leftovers again

Scribe: HEY! the broccoli was freshly steamed

v- and…?

Scribe: are you referring how I avoid saying I am a CARNIVORE?

V- THAT! THAT RIGHT THERE

Scribe: ( chuckles ) I tease you ruthlessly about how I’m a meat-eater

v- [ chuckling ] explain

Scribe: oh, there are hints that you are health-conscious… that you may

v- be vegan

Scribe: I have no idea (for sure) maybe not as far as vegan…

v- vegetarian… you know the difference

Scribe: will you stop… HOWEVER, I think the carnivore in you

v- it’s YOU!

Scribe: DESIRES meat whenever I am preparing and tasting my home cooked meal

v- I really don’t like you, you know:?

Scribe: mmm. mmm, mmm

v- stop.

20:32

Scribe: so, I posted a PhotoSnap Storyreel (AKA Instagram Story(ring)… and I, for at least this post, will reveal what’s in it. From now on, people will just have to CLICK

v- stop… we all know you track

Scribe: creepy, huh? Oh, be aware of the data hoarder

v- [ chuckles ] … I know what you really say.

Scribe: ANYWAY, here it is folks, I side by side. What I posted and when, and then, what I call for now, a creative adjacency (mirroring) by Trickster AKA Jason Silva.

Scribe: it’s so much easier this InBetween (in between fiction and reality) than having to filter you out (make you all sketchy or blur you out completely from the image)

v- stop…

Scribe: ok, first “frame” out of this storyreel

20:35

———- [ searching for JS screenshots … a slight shift in sensation… warmer… a silky oil slick kind of sensation, maybe warm water inner body sense ]

21:15

Scribe: so, I opened up my first PhotoSnap AKA Instagram account the 17th of December, and that day and into the early morning hours of the 18th I started posting photos into a gallery for the account @virtuonaut

00:00 18 December 2018 I posted this acrobatic plane (from the Oshkosh EAA - Experimental Aircraft Association - Museum) … I’m originally from the Oshkosh, Wisconsin area.

v- rural area

scribe: you say that with a sort of loathing

v- we are so different in some ways, C… you put “C” …as you know, I will not write my nickname out…

v- only people who are familiar with you use it… wow, you’ve got this down to an art form

Scribe: just how I do things

FlipPlane18dec15at0000.png
IMAGE: LifeSnippet AKA Facebook post by Jason Silva approx 07:11 on 18 December 2015 (Year 42) retrieved 08:04 - 53 minutes after original post time per FB timestamping

IMAGE: LifeSnippet AKA Facebook post by Jason Silva approx 07:11 on 18 December 2015 (Year 42) retrieved 08:04 - 53 minutes after original post time per FB timestamping

21:25 Scribe: I don’t know who all I followed when I opened my Instagram account. I mainly followed recommended (landscape) photographers, but I’m pretty sure I followed Jason Silva. I do remember unfollowing him 00:00 23 December 2015, the beginning of my data fast … for 16 days - no posts, no checking social media [ except Instagram - just landscapes ]

v- AND

Scribe: argh. you’re going to make me mention it.

v- YES

Scribe: FINE. I forgot to turn off the Ideapod e-mail push notifications.

v- AND?

Scribe: argh. it was the first?

v- yes, the first,,

Scribe: the first DIRECT CONTACT Jason Silva

v- AKA Trickster… I like this InBetween

Scribe: it was January 1st.

v- please show the image … and give the context

Scribe: by that point in time - 18 months into the InnerNet experience, I had already told… one other person

v- that’s it?!

Scribe: I’m trying to think back to who all I told. There are very few people I would consider within my very close inner circle… including close family members, ut that was more a case of conservative

v- they wouldn’t believe the telepathy part… have they?

Scribe: my guess? no

v- you’re the elephant in the room

Scribe: when I tell people this is what I say:

there is so much that has happened to me. I want you to lead discussion and ask me the questions you are wondering about all this

v- and?

Scribe: to date?

v- no one asks… omg… I’m so sorry, C

Scribe: eh, it’s my life. since this has happened, I look back on who I was… if someone had told me what I told them? it’s difficult to say what I would have done… it’s my nature to..

v- snoop

Scribe: I would have done some snooping, yes… based on what they told me

v- you would want to know what happened

Scribe: they are my closest friends/family… of COURSE I would do that… and IDK,.. IDK what to think…

v- no one’s approached you

Scribe: no one has reached out, no… on their end… and IDK… let’s just move on, ok?

v- alright… sorry, so, you told your second person on January 1st, 2016

Scribe: yes

v- do you have that transcript?

Scribe: it’s minimal, but yes

v- the timestamp?

Scribe: yes

v- get it out - just look at it - and give me the timestamp

Scribe: I’m remembering there was something weird with one of your posts that day

v- hm, hm

Scribe : that I tracked down 8 days later

v- I know…

Scribe: it was a lot of backdating that I had to do

v- no exact timestamps

Scribe: hm, Instagram was lost (except for the day)…Twitter and FB have hourly/dated timestamps for a while…

v- yeah, I know

Scribe: so, I talked to someone that day… and then later that night I get a push notification [ I will check on the conversation timestamp … we were at a bookstore? coffee shop? I can’t remember - it will be on my transcript

v- you wrote that down?

Scribe: I think so. maybe also in my typed log

v- oh, this was handwritten

Scribe: yes… so… here’s what came in from Ideapod that night of January 1st, 2016:

[at the request of “V”(voice).. a screenshot of the e-mail [ editing out private recipient e-mail data ] —— increasing temple pressure sensation 21:46

LastYearAtMarienbad.jpeg

21:48 Scribe: I’ve told this story plenty of times. here is a now archived WanderingMindSpace (WMS) InstaFeed (iF) post from 14th of September of this fall where I describe how I believe the film club Jason Silva held on Ideapod perhaps were related to my experiences on the InnerNet / A Wandering Mind:

LastYearAtMarienbadWMSiF.png

21:51 Scribe: I was in the Central time zone (U.S.) January 1st.

01jan16at1152-1236.jpeg
IMAGE: I end my data fast on January 8th (and I am back in the Easter Timezone - the Facebook timestamped reflects this , and one of Jason Silva’s posts on Facebook is this one....)

IMAGE: I end my data fast on January 8th (and I am back in the Easter Timezone - the Facebook timestamped reflects this , and one of Jason Silva’s posts on Facebook is this one....)

FullSizeRender.jpg

Scribe: interesting posts to make at 13:34 (12:34 pm Central Time)...

 

21:57 v- that isn’t your handwriting [ on the January 1st transcription ]

Scribe: 12:20 - 12:36 are. 11:52 - 12:04 is the handwriting of the person I was with

v- AKB

Scribe: correct.

21:58

21:59 Scribe: yeah [ chuckling ] this individual doesn’t like you

v- oh, I know

Scribe: most of the people who I’ve told don’t

v- I know

Scribe: as I’m sure is the case on your end

v- oh, you’ll be surprised

Scribe: this connection is NOT easy on a regular basis

v- because you haven’t gotten your answer

Scribe: I do NOT enjoy the side effects

v- I know [ quietly ] lack of sleep is one of them

Scribe: I was a SOLID sleeper before all this. Now I have a world traveler who presents all over the world? ODD when I wake up, too… It’s just… for 4.5 years I’ve been on this routine

v- other than your own

Scribe: and I know mine is more regular… but it still wrecks havoc on you, too, I’m sure… but it’s one thing fort me to be typing out EXACTLY what has been happening

v- and you don’t get this AT ALL

scribe: just ambiguous posts  that could be interpreted any number of ways

v- I know

22:01 Scribe: See? see what I did? I wanted to just put the images side by side and be done with it… and I’m ONCE AGAIN

v- going off on tangents… to explain

Scribe: at the request … half of the time…

v- by the voice in your head

Scribe: which, yes , I can ignore… but since I’m already doing this

v- this is going away, isn’t it

Scribe: it’s too much RAW DATA,.. it makes me look like a fool … without you.

v- I know

Scribe: I can’t explain how divided I am on a regular basis - no one comes forward. What does that mean? am I seeing too much into something? am I noticing patterns that aren’t really there? and on and on and on… all the while I have heartwarming and temple pressure, and the whole chillaxy spring water clear sense for the last couple of days [ my environment stays pretty much the same unless I go outdoors to run an errand … so inside … and it’s like the weather is changing inside me? strange stuff… FOUR YEARS

v- I know

Scribe: accelerated heartbeat… while I’m at rest (I’m perfectly healthy)… those are the main ones

v- the lack of sleep sucks

Scribe: yeah

22:05 Scribe: and I won’t even go into how I KNOW you are doing drugs

v- [ chuckling ] I know

Scribe: and you WILL have to come clean about ALL of it and how it’s affected me

v- done

Scribe: NOT YET

22:06

V- you are not a “drug user”

Scribe: no, I am not… and I also want to go on the record as

when you were HIGH and kissing Rachel.. I felt it before any of the videos came out.

I KNEW because I had experienced it back in October of  2015 before you kissed that sketchy girl … I have a LOG … so when I FELT it probably coincided with the ACTION not the posting… as gar as I know.,. and you know what I was doing at that time?

I was PRINTING UP A LOG FOR THIS…

v- I know…

Scribe: so, if in the future someone QUESTIONS if I didn’t do enough? if I didn’t try enough

v- yu more than tried

Scribe: AND I SHARED… and I know I have the advantage because I am a No one… a private citizen when you are a public figure. I get that…

22:08

22:09 so I experienced ALL SORTS of sensations that I have no “cause” evidence - you may not have posted anything… but it doesn’t mean I didn’t sense it… it doesn’t mean it didn’t happen… because I’m SURE things happened

v- we’ll track it, ok?

scribe: we can’t document our entire lives. that’s not living… but WOW I ASKED within the first few months just to let me know YES or NO,… and … I know it takes time to prove something… but it’s been a really long time

v- of hell, I know… sorry.

Scribe: and I  understand the art… ok?

v- but when you don’t know for sure

Scribe: … when part of me HAS TO ACCEPT that it could just be how I’m misinterpreting it? yes, I have difficulties … because I’m experiencing something that has no cure. The cure is someone telling me … it’s not a DISEASE

v: I know

Scribe: I don’t want to upset you … we do this OVER AND OVER … let’s get back to the comparisons

v= fine. have you eaten?

Scribe: no, I can go fo that.

v- do that…

22:12

v- I wish you’d leave this up

Scribe: there are so many reasons I have to archive : two of which are this:

who doesn’t know? [ family and friends ]

what if they stumble upon this?

WHAT ABOUT POTENTIAL EMPLOYERS?

Let alone any stranger who things

v- yo'u’ve gone off the deep end

scribe: that I need SERIOUS MENTAL HEALTH therapy/treatment

22:13

22:14 v- I know

Scribe: so, it’s a serious matter for me to post this publicly,.. and I’m a private citizen nobody,,. it has had CONSEQUENCES on my life… as I know it has on yours,. and I just

v- want it to end… meaning an answer… I know, and it’s coming SOON

Scribe: Oh, you would. Before Stranger Things there was A Wandering Mind.

22:19 Scribe: so, the e-mail from JS on Jan 1, 2016 was sent 09:30ish Central Time [ I live in Eastern Time - so my archived e-mail inbox that I just screenshotted automatically converts it to my location time ] , and this is when I saw it in my inbox and my: reaction / what I sensed from the Other.

IMG_0103.jpeg

September 14, 2018 I posted a WMSiF (now archived)…

MIA2015.png

BACK TO PRESENT

22:30 V- How’re your cheerios?

Scribe: light, late dinner

v- hm, hm

Scribe: so, the after Hellhole trip'

v- will you stop, I know you hate that place

Scribe:… here's Maya and me at the beach… it was her first time at a beach

v- aw… and she died recently

Scribe: yes, her health started to decline around the time of this trip - she wasn’t eating during the trip, which worried me. I finally got her to eat bits of hamburger … she passed away this past Spring

v- date and time

Scribe: as chance would have it, unbelievably so… she passed away

v- in your arms

Scribe: at home [ she’d been diagnosed with terminal cancer ] …

v- time…

Scribe: it just seems so crazy to even admit this… the time of her death was 1:16 - 1:17 June 10th

v- and WHY is this significant?

Scribe: in A Wandering Mind [ see “Interference” the numbers 1 and 6

v- are spacetime portals

Scribe: yeah, there’s more weirdness about that trip

v- a dream you had prior

Scribe: that after the fact, depending how you look at it…

v- was a foreshadowing of that trip… with her… which you didn’t know you’d take

Scribe: it was pretty spur-of-the-moment … I had a window of opportunity

v- and you took it

Scribe: I was separated…

v - and spending the holiday alone

Scribe: and I’m going on the record that without that trip? I would have had a HAPPY holiday and I would have been perfectly fine alone

v- I know

Scribe: anyway, I was separated and my children were spending Christmas with their father and his family (out of state)

22:39 Scribe: when one doesn’t have children for a good span of time

v- one takes a trip to get an answer. got it.

22:40 Scribe: different lives

v- yes, very

22:40 so, I data fast 23 Dec - 08 Jan… and when I come back online, I see one of Jason Silva’s posts after I had left the city…

BACKTRACK TO DECEMBER 2015

Screen Shot 2018-12-08 at 9.39.34 PM.png

SM checks [ because after an hour… I don’t have by the minute timestamps ]

Scribe sees Trickster’s LifeSnippet post (“9 minutes ago” retrieved at 22:45)

22:45 Scribe: Oh, you would

v- row, row, row your boat… next image please

22:46 Scribe: oh, the next image is actually about architectural tunnel vision: note the timestamp… still up in my @virtuonaut

ArchitecturalTunnelvision.jpg

you and your accelerated heart beat, although subtle right now (SAHB, not extreme)

22:51

SAHB

22:54

Scribe: you changed the cover image on the video

23:06

v- no…. you’re not looking hard enough

23:07 Scribe: I think the video was Architecting the Mind (YouTube March 14, 2017) - and the original cover image was very similar to my May 10th, 2016 image. I probably have a screensht

v- in the piles of data

Scribe: on some external hard drive that I am NOT going to track down right now - I’ll find it tomorrow and splice it into this PLACEHOLDER SPACE

23:11 no cover image like that one. Ok. onto your CHANNELING mirrored video that resembles my Instagram post

Screen Shot 2018-12-08 at 9.12.03 PM.png
Screen Shot 2018-12-08 at 9.14.59 PM.png
29oct14.png
Screen Shot 2018-12-08 at 9.11.49 PM.png
Screen Shot 2018-12-08 at 9.11.27 PM.png
Screen Shot 2018-12-08 at 9.10.58 PM.png

23:22 Scribe: while looking for something else, I found the original screenshot

IMG_5878.png
OdonataLoveAsDrugWIDE.jpg

23:27 Scribe: I sweepy… I’ll reorganize this mañana.

v- hasta mañana, then. Love you… until NOW.

Scribe: love you, you beastie of a man

v- you would! you can’t be nice

Scribe: maybe I’ll be so sweet to you when you first meet me, you’ll be like: WHO ARE YOU?1!

V: Filterrrrrrssss

23:29