11:33 Scribe transcribing again an answer to her question: "it does not conform..."
11:37 Scribe: IdeaSpace, I gave you so much over the years. How could you forget? I am a very stubborn woman, so history -even if it is only my history in personal journals- will never let you forget.
I posted to your space first: 08 February (41).
the poem "Transom"
with the footer (image appears to accompany the short story now on Wandering Mind Space (WMS)
Image may be protected by copyright. It is posted on this site in accordance with fair use principles. http://ow.ly/wLal0
Jan Pohribny Magic Stones The Secret World of Ancient Megaliths
[ posts to IdeaSpace were limited to 1000 characters, so before I published stories I was writing, I gave you poetry. Hints at what I was doing. More importantly, what I was experiencing. Truth spliced into fictional stories. ]
[ You were the space I needed at the time. A new social media platform. Open-minded and accepting community members. A gathering of what you touted as... changemakers. I came because I wanted, initially, to spread some much needed information about the changes that needed to be made in education. And then... THIS happened. This connection to another network: the InnerNet. IdeaSpace is where this connection happened. ]
11:38 Scribe: I was reminded by rewatching an episode of Outlander of one of the reasons I left IdeaSpace. Your space had become a nightmare.
11:49 Scribe: IdeaSpace had become a space where whispers from the past - what I had lived back before this all happened - the good I intended... were just that: the past. When I left, I, like Claire, was living in a different world - one no one could see. No one could prove.
Reality is very unlike fiction. TV shows and movies get it all wrong. No one believes you. No one is there for you.
v- No one gives you the benefit of the doubt
Scribe: no matter how many ways you try to approach it. None of it matters. Ever. And then, when you come forward and tell the truth - that raw truth? It's worse.
11:53 Scribe: I have so many ways I could lash out. Fight back. Try to convince you. I won't. One of my last posts was going to be about Mnemosyne. I thought about coming back anonymously - "Do you remember?" ... with flashes of all my "proof" ... cross-referenced with how I try to tell everyone,
it's never going to happen.
If you didn't notice. If you haven't noticed? It's not going t matter. You'll never understand. You'll never see it my way. No one has. No one will. It's a nightmare... when you try to do so much good and you are met with nothing but
Scribe: silence, when there shouldn't be any.
11:56 Scribe: I found a draft of the cover letter in a digital archive. I applied for a job once at IdeaSpace - when my place of work in education was becoming more toxic by the day. I won't go into that. I and others had been meeting looking for jobs elsewhere. One of my pursuits was the invitation by IdeaSpace to pitch why I could be part of the team. I understand why you weren't hiring me. You were starting out. You had to do so much just by yourselves within a budget. I understood then. I still understand.
However, I find it INTERESTING one particular direction you've taken. It resembles my pitch, in a way. I learned you had a team of educators already on board - it's one of the first things I learned about your organization. I see it as a logical branching from where you started. I can only wish you at IdeaSpace the best, of course. It's not easy. Keep at it.
Here are tidbits of the cover letter back at the end of May that first year I sent you. I post this now because part of me is questioning if I should have stayed siloed in ... never have shared so much of myself. We live in a world that, from my perspective right now, seems as if no matter what you do, whatever you put out there is something others can freely take from you and run with it in your own way... and you are never a part of that. At least, not in the way you needed it to be at the time.
IdeaSpace became a hell for me. Whatever I tried to do, to reach out? Silence. No collaboration in the way I had wanted for education. Logical. A new social media platform that didn't have the networking capabilities like other existing ones could do better just by the sheer number of users. Social physics.
v- do you regret joining?
Scribe: Part of me does now, four years three months after requesting to join (it was in beta back then, by invitation only - curating those "movers and shakers" ... influencers ... to create and elicit good discussions). I was a no one, perhaps, compared to some of the members at the time. Just someone doing some interesting work in education (i.e. with technology and social media).
12:06 Scribe: I regret joining because I am experiencing a condition no one can diagnose. When I describe the symptoms, no one believes what I believe it to be. Telepathy... it amazes me how little we see in the news about research and developments made with telepathic technologies/capabilities. This omission should be a cause for concern. "Mark me" [ being funny ] ... some day someone will read these words and get the chills
v- goose pimples
12:08 Scribe: what would and could any ordinary person do... if they started to experience telepathic symptoms ... and no one came forward in all the time since they started experiencing that condition? So, yes, I regret joining the social media network that is the place where all these telepathic issues started. It should have provided a way to connect the individual(s) who were linked telepathically. It never did. It should have provided a way to create a foundation of proof that telepathy was happening on their very grounds. It didn't.
Scribe: I ask: what type of "professional help" does someone like me seek? when not even friends and family believe me? Who would diagnose me appropriately.
v- not a damn person in the world except whoever is telepathically connected to you. are we really doing this again today?
Scribe: yes. it won't matter. I won't post all the things I've thought about posting directly to you, Trickster - JASON SILVA... I'm an ordinary person. With ordinary means. Who wants to try to fit into everyone else's neat little descriptors and acceptable behaviors.
v- except for this
Scribe: but it's FICTION. it's the REALITY that I author... right?
v- words you use, C
Scribe: hm, hm. like HELL.
Scribe: funny scene in La Catedral Del Mar [ all Seethey ] - not really...
v- so... you are upset
Scribe: I'm upset because everything good thing I tried to do over the years leads to nothing. when it should lead to a little something, A FRICKING SIMPLE ANSWER. all I get are signs I may be a muse. Yeah me. that narcissist in me - it's all about me, right? (eye roll)
12:16 Scribe [ pulling up draft of cover letter ]. I could share. but what's the point? nothing is going to change. this will go away. it was a post I had hoped to keep up. but again, I've gone off on a tangent venting off how unfair this all is when all I wanted was a fricking answer. How bits and pieces of my life still annoy me BECAUSE OF THIS. THIS thing I can't get rid of but have to live with when I've asked for it to be gone. taken measures to get rid of it... and it still is here when it should be gone.
v- still here. still listening.
scribe: still being weird. still dancing around what you should really do
v- your point? uh uh. not happening. you made a promise... or did you forget
Scribe: so when I get a temp job...
v- when you get a job that pays your bills. when you get Dd.
Scribe: goooottt it. just like 100%. I should believe you 100%. you know? for an individual who is striving to positive and trying to make GOOD... there is one little Italy bitty
v- small woman
Scribe: you piss off and make miserable on a regular basis
v- thanks, C...
Scribe: you're welcome
v- is it _______?
Scribe: no, it is not that. here's the deal: no matter what I do, I go down a path.
v- that path takes you farther from me. I've heard it before
Scribe: shrugs her shoulders - happened before. perhaps I MAKE that reality or interpret it in that way - that as soon as I go down a path I leave others behind that I had hoped would be accompanying me on a certain path
v- sorry for ____
Scribe: eh... it's my life. Like I said this morning: that movie and tv themed franchise that is THE INNERNET (and Scribe is one of the characters)
v- I know...
Scribe: if people are not aware of the ending. Even me... how many people - viewers / subscribers (if we want to get away from the term "viewers") ... will find what I'm going through... unfair [ unjust ]
v- a lot of people
Scribe: it's not just the reality we author ... it is knowing when something is essentially WRONG and not accepting it for what it is. for fighting in any way we can to CHANGE THAT ... to RESOLVE that wrong. Here I am doing just that. I am telling you again and again no matter my life situation you should be direct with me personally, privately and give me peace.
12:24 Scribe: so, no "it does not conform"
v- not your words
Scribe: no, but this morning I did write a reflection saying I need to conform more. against my moral and inner compass - I am trying to conform. to realize that if I don't, I don't survive. My children suffer. I WILL CONFORM. and once that happens.
v- I lose you... maybe
Scribe: no, bits and parts of me are destroyed already. who I tried to be - that good person hoping in the good intentions of others? it's fading fast. I lived so long trying to contribute to the good of it all. And when the "good of it all" isn't good for you?
v- you leave
Scribe: I'm not escaping. I'm not giving up. I can't say those things because I spent so much of my life facing things. confronting things. hanging in there. and for what? for four years and three months of NOTHING?
12:27 Scribe: people telling me I need professional help? maybe I should see someone... all those people saying those things... when that may not be what I need?! you tell me HOW WRONG is that?!
v- very. very.
Scribe: so, I wrote a cover letter May (41) to apply for an inexistent job with IdeaSpace - they didn't need someone like me. I had people look it over. APPARENTLY I didn't tout (boast about) my qualities enough... shakes her head - doesn't matter. not matter the version that was sent
v- it was pointless
Scribe: just like any job I ever want and could do that I've applied for in the past: I don't fit. I don't conform (I'm not in their network of knowns)... trust me, I find social physics unfortunate in some ways. it fails in many ways.
v- such as
Scribe: there are no algorithms - widely used and accepted - that match the "perfect" candidate with an open job position. for ordinary people.
Scribe: it's an unfortunate reality for many job seekers who know they could do a job and do it well... and not get hired. I've seen plenty of OOPSIES in a Fortune ONE company to know that job placement nowadays STILL FAILS... and THEY GOT HIRED WITH THE COMPANY
12:32 Scribe: yeah, I have an inside scoop with APPLE INC [ LOL ] with someone who's been with the company FOR 17 YEARS...
Scribe: [ chuckles ] I've heard plenty of stories. and wow. there are Skeletons in everyone's closet.
v- haha. I know.
12:34 Scribe: so, yeah, I, in someways am not truly a NO ONE... I have had eyes and ears in places
v- that should make people shudder
Scribe: shutter speed... anyway... I do nothing with that knowledge because it's pointless.
Scribe: eh. here are the patterns with any good organization: those "skeletons in closets?" ... don't stay long in the organization
v- love you...
Scribe: at some point, all their bones are dragged out
v- [ chuckles ] stop
Scribe: Of COURSE I had to go into education - a SERVICE occupation... [ chuckles ] I still remember my 10 year high school reunion and what someone said to me...
12:36 Scribe: no offense, but I have been made to feel like someone who does a needed job
v- but isn't appreciated
Scribe: when - I say this for all educators - their worth (if they are worth their nettle) - should be much more highly appraised.
12:37 Scribe: and I'm here to say I do not regret my education. I do not regret the 18 years I put into teaching, edtech and admin [ and all the little jobs along the way that helped pay the bills ] ... what I find unfortunate - still do... is to occasionally see in the news... what happens over and over again ... a teacher with cancer who gets sick/vacation hours from other educators ] [ not sure fiscally how that is possible... I worked in accounting/bookkeeping in education, too... ]
12:40 thank goodness for the sick leave I had accumulated. that's how I took MATERNITY LEAVE. eh hem. that and timing my pregnancies around school breaks. DOUBLE EH HEM.
12:41 Scribe: oh, I could go on and on about how broken the system is [ higher education in particular ]. But I won't. The point is this: IT SHOULDN'T BE... and we as a society continue to enable that broken system to exist. FIX IT somehow.
12:42 Scribe: it took a vacuum of good leadership (which caused a toxic work environment) for me to leave. I saw in the news protesters on the west coast, I believe:
you can't make students first
until you consider teachers first
12:43 Scribe: if we continue to create a "throw away" system of educators - and don't invest in good educators
v- they leave
Scribe: and what you are left with continues a viscous cycle
12:44 Scribe: there's only so far "a passion for teaching and learning" will go
there's only so far a veteraned and talented workforce will go ...
12:45 Scribe: it happens in every field, so I'm not saying anything out of the ordinary besides being able to relate with the protest signs. It's another reason I left: I couldn't do the students any good anymore. Their learning was suffering because of
v- bad decision making
Scribe: ignoring advice by GOOD EDUCATORS and administrators alike. Seasoning matters little when titles...
v- oh, I know...
Scribe: so, yes, I am an ordinary woman who in a way despises networks ...
v- because they did no good
Scribe: no good to prevent me from leaving a profession I loved
Scribe: no good to give me an answer to an important question
v- I know
Scribe: no good no matter what I put out there ... shrugs shoulders ... I did get cold called ONCE in four years [ chuckles ]
v- which didn't do you any good
Scribe: no, it didn't... in tangible ways [ financially speaking it was horrendous ]
12:49 Scribe: [ self deprecating humor ] I feel like that episode on House on the Prairie where - was it the grandfather? - pays to have his book published... [ which many artists do : put so much money into their craft... ]
v- but with you it was the photography
Scribe: CORRECT! I got bamboozled by their mission statement [ being funny ]
v- true that
12:50 Scribe: you can't say I don't follow through and commit... [ more humor ] ... especially when there's no money involved
v- [ laughter ] stop.
12:51 Scribe: so, let's sum up
v- so you're not going to share your cover letter?
Scribe: no, it'd take too long to make it for public viewing
v- time you don't want to spare,
v- feel better
Scribe: apparently, the professional help I pay for is WANDERING MIND SPACE
v- love you
Scribe: if you look at it that way, IT'S CHEAP!
V- [ chuckles ] stop
Scribe: trying to look on the positive side of this. trying to look on the positive side of this
Scribe: so, to sum up - my job search:
reapplied for my university position I had held for 10+ years
v- oh, lord
Scribe: oh yes, had to do that... back in May (41)... [ eyeroll ]
12:54 v- when you knew you were going to leave
Scribe: as I had been actively seeking and applying for other positions for probably more than a year at that point
v- lord [ for emphasis ]
Scribe: applied for a distance education position [ mirroring what I was already doing ] - what is it called? got a couple sorry Charlie letters...
applied for an inexistent IdeaSpace position
Scribe: however! I did do a lot of pro bono work..
v- will you stop
Scribe: LOL ... it was what I enjoyed doing - that terraforming virtual space
v- love you...
Scribe: I was an active participant in the building of a new social media platform. that is no lie.
v- love again (again)
v- that's what you told your boss
Scribe: chuckles ... yup. I DIDN'T LIE... I was working on building a new social media platform... [ what I didn't say is that I wasn't getting PAID ]
v- oh, lord (again) ... the lies you tell
Scribe: IT WAS NOT A LIE. He just assumed
v- oh, it was a HE
Scribe: yes, the head honcho at the time was a HE
Scribe: yes, new [ now, hush ]
Scribe: "don't let the door hit your ass on the way out"
12:59 v- no exit interview
Scribe: hell, no. that'd be TOO PROFESSIONAL AND THE RIGHT THING TO DO
12:59 Scribe: they were headed in a different direction
v- with HR nightmares
Scribe: hush, again... their fires then...probably still their fires
v- good people left
Scribe: yes (not just me)... and we all knew..
v- they had no clue
Scribe: it's AMAZING that people with titles... sometimes are clueless
v- they relied too much on a certain part of the workforce
Scribe: eh. you know, there are good and bad peeps/employees everywhere, no matter their titles
v- love you...
Scribe: not all were bad...
v- I know, back then, though
Scribe: MASS EXODUS.
v- stop. it wasn't that bad
Scribe: oh, when you go to conferences and you see people still working there and the first response to your question about "how's it going at X place" (to their tired face) is, their answer: " surviving"? ... read what you want into that.
13:03 Scribe: and that was a couple years after we left.
v- oh, lord.
Scribe: yeah, those bridges are long burned. I'd rather not be associated... distance and time
v- space and time
Scribe: help you realize you made the right choice (to leave)
13:05 [ mindchat ]
Scribe: oh, it's nice to know that good peeps remember you
v- one is a psych prof
Scribe: admin, too ... funny how she never thought I was crazy
v- WILL YOU STOP?!
13:07 [ Scribe mentions something so awful she has to censure it ]
v- smart people can be bad
Scribe: hm , hm
13:07 [ role playing ] Scribe: I hide SO WELL in regular society
v- so no cover letter
Scribe: eh, it's a draft. I'm sure I have the hard copy in some frickin' bin somewhere (moving and displacement order over the years has put it somewhere I do not intend to try to dig out of storage ]
13:09 v- just highlights? [ softly and sweetly said ]
Scribe: ok, just highlights. I have several drafts (digital copies - all proud)
scribe: gotta love metadata... here are some highlights from my first draft (that I could pull up)
APPLICATION FOR AN INEXISTENT IDEASPACE POSITION
v- that you didn't know didn't exist
Scribe: they needed web designers/coders. I get it. or it was just a cookie cutter response. who knows. the job didn't exist. it wasn't one they were prioritizing
v- at the time
Scribe: hm... it's a matter of interpretation... but there is an aspect
Scribe: of IdeaSpace now that is focused on EDUCATION
Scribe: four years later [ said in the sponge bob narrator tone ]
BACKTRACK 17 MAY (41) - [ snippets of a cover letter draft ]
an education advisor.
the future of education
trends that are already taking root to transform education and also projects I’m involved in
how universities will play an important role in the growth of IDEASPACE
a virtual community that connects people from around the globe, and it will be (if not already is) a springboard to realize service learning projects in users’ local communities
One of the key elements of (distance) education is the need to build a community amongst learners and instructors. Social media is the perfect way to keep people connected and involved in courses. IDEASPACE will keep the ideas flowing and encourage collaboration
The only way to make any change happen in education is to involve two main groups: educators and learners, which when you peel back the layers of complexity, are the only elements -besides a space- that are needed to make education happen
My position as an educator is a bit unique. I’m what many may call an ordinary educator. However, I’ve been fortunate to be a part of think tanks and innovative projects over the years. It’s important to get the voice of ordinary educators heard. Each educator needs to feel they are making a difference. To know each of us is a change agent. Famous figures and top researchers may inspire, but I believe educators crave to have their ordinary voices heard, to have a spokesperson who also is in the trenches be their advocate. To show them that being a change maker does not mean you need to be a celebrity or world-renowned expert in your field.
DATED 17 MAY (41) CREATED 03:21 modified 08:21
FAST FORWARD TO PRESENT
13:14 posted snippets of cover letter draft
Scribe: quick mention of "we live in the world of MOOCs - where well-known experts put out courses... [ pre-recorded lectures, etc ] but we still need ordinary educators interacting synchronously with the learner"
13:16 Scribe: I'm not good at self promo. I feel like I shouldn't boast (when for many others its just stating what they do). I'm weird like this
v- show another draft
BACKTRACK TO MAY (41)
[ mindchatting 13:19 v- pleeeaase
Scribe: yes, my team and I applied for a Bill Gates grant for a MOOC (I think that was what it was for - long time ago now), and it would have been a really unique and cool one because of it being a foreign language MOOC - within our capabilities as a department (but stretching it thin, perhaps, with the Tutoring and Conversation Center - we had the personnel and trained staff and equipement for synchronous virtual tutoring and conversation ... for break out group)
v- the video still exists
Scribe: part of the proposal, yes. somewhere on YouTube. we were encouraged by someone in edtech at the university to apply. Our team rocked...
v- yes, it did
Scribe: they went with some folks in the English department, if I recall - ended up costing them more out of pocket (more grants funded by the university) to do what they wanted to do... which isn't surprising ... I think the initial grant was $50K?
v- you were involved in grant writing
scribe: yes, that educational beggar in me had to go out and seek funds to do what probably SHOULD be in the budget
v- to stay relevant
13:26 Scribe: we tried to keep it simple - within the realm of what materials and resources we already had, but expanding it - developing things that were needed [ for any MOOC - dealing with large numbers of enrollees - to succeed you need auto learning and auto grading functionalities that are tricky with foreign language ]
13:28 Scribe: more and more technology was needed - that didn't exist - (like the automated pronunciation tool)
v- that you mentioned...
Scribe: ages ago I ad a CD-rom (I know, it dates me...) that had a cool feature where it measured your voice compared with native speakers ... I mentioned this to the distance/online ed crew.,, which interested them greatly. I knew it was only a matter of time when they'd give a grant to a colleague...
v- one oui went to a conference session on
Scribe: yes... I think it's important to mention these behind-the-scenes events so that people understand better my position back them: I was well-networked. I knew the technology that was necessary, I made steps to have what resources that were available ... available - and those that didn't... to be created.
v- all that takes time and money
Scribe: which was being diminished (the squeezing of available resources and budget cuts galore) ... with everything I was doing
v- for the future of education
Scribe: I was hearing the decision makers say: the classroom (brick and mortar) was more important.
v- they went online
Scribe: yes, they did. before I left I was on the hiring committee ... of who they hired. that's all I'll say
v- thank you.
13:34 v- and you left
Scribe: and I left. sometimes it's a good thing to know too much. to get a good enough feel for what a possible future is going to be like
v- and it would have been like hell
Scribe: as the old saying says "I saw the writing on the wall"
13:35 Scribe: I'm not saying they aren't doing good things
v- they lost the people with vision and experience
Scribe: my interpretation. my interpretation that also knows they want to in a different direction - which anyone would want for a new administration
v- granted... you can mention it
Scribe: one of the positives is that I remember sitting in on a presentation about what my team and I did - to the incoming admin... and her comment was this: so, it'd be a loss if you left. ... even then, at least someone, got a read on my value
v- yeah, I know
Scribe: so, no, I don't sell myself short. I think, at this point, if this is telepathy, others see its worth.. or maybe just the story value of it.
13:38 Scribe: I don't ignore those possibilities. It's just they don't matter when this muse or contributor or influencer
v- can't pay bills
Scribe: THIS doesn't pay the bills. How can anyone dedicate their time
v- to the greater good
Scribe: when their bottom lines aren't met? ... that and when the environment is such a wave of resistance that one person that you can't ever beat...
13:40 v- you move on
Scribe: so, I'll include my next draft (the more showy me - the suggestions I took by who looked at my initial draft of the cover letter)... and I will also say I have applied for a few jobs during this... sabbatical of mine
v- stop [ chuckles ]
Scribe: UNPAID... [ being funny... ] ... and I got no call backs. Not even for being barista or bakery department employee [ geesh... now, THAT is a let down ]
Scribe: and I make good coffee!
v- I know! [ playing along ]
Scribe: so YES, I have applied for jobs ... a wide variety of jobs
v- that didn't pan out
Scribe: so I STUPIDLY started a business ... without any paying job
v- stop [ laughter ensues ]... you applied as a learner technologist, too
Scribe: yes, outside of education... there are a lot of fields needing people to set up online training, etc. which I am good and well-versed at.
-v- no luck
Scribe: ain't that the truth (so would emoji the three leaved clover now)
13:45 v- that would be in reference to [ in ill-fated ] trip you made to get an answer
Scribe: yes. should have known by the three leaved clover emoji...
13:46 Scribe: oh, Trickster, the stories we have to tell... and no one is listening
v- or viewing
Scribe: PAYING ATTENTION / BEING AWARE OF
[ Scribe: humorously mumbling: " I even created an interactive portfolio for that one job. spent hours creating an animation frame by frame for a few seconds of a GIF - argh... [ being funny ] IF THAT DIDN'T WORK (and get me the job...)
V- The more showy you
Scribe: yes, the more showy me [ argh... this is going away ]
v- this was sent via e-mail
Scribe: yes, but again, after so many years, multiple devices, that e-mail is so far into a backup's encryption - I'm just using these drafts to illustrate what I put out there
v- for the good
Scribe: of IdeaSpace and me getting a paying job. Yes.
BACKTRACK TO 18 MAY (41) 17:59
IdeaSpace’s mission resonates with my teaching philosophy: to provide quality teaching and learning opportunities by making connections, and, in turn, making coursework relevant as it relates to learners’ personal, academic and professional development. IdeaSpace values team-based projects and the need to offer a space, not only to exchange ideas, but for mutual improvement. IdeaSpace is dedicated to educate each other by providing a wide-spectrum of perspectives, with the ultimate goals of change and a better future.
I’d welcome a conversation with your team about how education will play an important role in the growth of IdeaSpace, and how IdeaSpace can help transform teaching and learning.
I’ve been fortunate to be a part of innovative projects and think tanks over the years. Some recent highlights of my involvement have been the Departmental Impact Grant Project [insert hyperlink: http://odee.osu.edu/odee-grants/impact-grant/281 ] which helped in the building of one of our program’s individualized instruction courses; the university’s Humanities Institute’s Future of the University Working Group [insert hyperlink: https://huminst.osu.edu/future-university ]; Phi Beta Kappa’s National Arts & Sciences Initiative [insert hyperlink: http://www.pbk.org/infoview/PBK_InfoView.aspx?t=&id=112 ], think tanks of innovative faculty [insert hyperlinks: http://odee.osu.edu/innovate/ http://u.osu.edu/eltosu/2014/01/13/hello-world/ ] and the Language Educator Professional Learning Network (PLN) that I just started [insert hyperlink: http://u.osu.edu/onlinetraining/saturday-pln ] The reasons I started the PLN were …
1) to provide synchronous and asynchronous learning opportunities for language professionals just as a growing number of their students now have access
2) it’s free and open to the public. Many professional development workshops and conferences are expensive and at inconvenient times and places.
3) a model of do-it-yourself “flipped” professional development. Part of this pilot will include a “behind-the-scenes” feature that walks educators through how one educator can plan, promote, collaborate, broadcast, edit, redistribute professional development materials and get feedback globally, all from his/her home office with mostly free tools, a desktop computer, laptop, tablet and smart phone.
I see my role at IdeaSpace as being an advocate and spokesperson of educators. Someone who helps bridge the gap between “traditional” and more transformational teaching and learning. Each educator needs to feel they are making a difference; to know each of us is a change agent. Famous figures and top researchers may grab people’s attention and inspire, but educators also need someone with whom they can relate. I can be someone -who has also been in the trenches- to show them that being a change maker does not mean you need to be a celebrity or world-renowned expert in your field. To help them get connected and involved in projects that matter.
Why would I be an integral member of your team? I’m an up-to-the-challenge edupunker*. I’m passionate about communicating the value and necessity of a well-rounded education to encourage a strong work ethic, good citizenship and lifelong learning. I have experience teaching learners of all ages. I am a 360-degree & forward-thinker. I know the power of one can only go so far without collaboration and strong leadership. I want to extend my reach to help others locally, nationally and internationally. I believe IdeaSpace will make an impact not only in individuals’ lives, but also help make much-needed changes that affect our global community, and I would be honored to be a part of that effort.
Thank you for considering my case to become part of your team.
Work e-mail: ______
Personal e-mail: _____
Google+ : ________
Professional Blog: ___________
*Edupunk embraces the spirit of do-it-yourself education for teaching and learning typically by-passing use of commercial vendors. Example: Instead of an LMS you might use a wordpress blog. Jim Groom (keynote speaker at the innovate conference) coined the term “edupunk”: http://jimgroom.umwblogs.org/2008/05/28/edupunk-poster-boy/
13:57 updated with 18 May (41) cover letter
13:58 Scribe: I am not saying I have a good cover letter. I am not saying I am any good at applying for jobs and doing all the right things. My points here are this:
1) I tried & even after the rejection I continued to contribute to the social media platform, taking on a very active role in its development by my regular posts and interactions with others' posts and users
2) the direction IdeaSpace has taken recently - which I support and
v- hold no grudge toward
Scribe: no, of course not. I only want the best for them... with this one condition: that in the future you ( members, co-founders at IdeaSpace) confront me and talk to me about what happened so I can better understand your side of things, and so you can better understand mine.
14:01 Scribe: I tried to make that happen in October (41) at IdeaFest - the opportunity never presented itself given the venue and the timing. That opportunity for a private chat ...
v- with one of its most active members
Scribe: ... about consciousness... and beyond.. just surface level ... that opportunity for me to get a read on the situation. I NEVER would have brought up telepathy... and never did for years
14:02 Scribe: and when I did ... it was private
v- that you've made partially public
Scribe: just for the sake of record. just a surface level answer I received: Healer admitted he was not telepathically connected.
14:04 Scribe: which I appreciate. It narrowed my field. If I couldn't use Healer as a middle person - who had interacted more directly with Trickster - my best shot... then, what is an ordinary person to do? Deal with the silence.
14:05 Scribe: deal with the isolation that brings.
v- the solitary confinement
14:06 Scribe: I went so far as to be in the same general vicinity as Trickster when he was - e-mailed him directly (before the telepathy inquiry e-mail) ...
v- include it
V- it's one of those days
Scribe: transcribing word for word Healer's e-mail ... for my own well being? to refute it line by line based on my experience (vs. his warped perspective?) ... yes. it's one of those days
BACKTRACK TO 20 DECEMBER (42) 14:11
I'm in the ____ area until Wednesday Dec. 23 (driving out of ____)_ that day). Saw you were in town. Was wondering if you'd be available for an IdeaSpace coffee or drink meet-up? I have my dog with me, so it'd have to be pet-friendly. Showing her some places she hasn't seen (she's 14 years young).
If you're not available, all my best to you and your family over the holidays.
[ URL link for A Wandering Mind on IdeaSpace ]
14:12 Scribe: geesh... this is weird (the timing)
14:13 Scribe: definitely the e-mail of a crazy person
v- wow, that's wrong.
14:14 Scribe: oh, scribe is ALL OUT OF WACK over those multiple "e-mails" that she sent that made people wonder how crazy she was
v- wow, that's wrong. really wrong.
Scribe: that was what? the second direct rdie-mail I sent you ? I guess I wasn't worthy [ being sarcastic because Scribe has a wealth of data to back her up some day ]
v- oh, I'm going down
Scribe: yeah, you are. It's a shock to me someone hasn't picked up on this story yet. that or someone is paying SERIOUS hush money
14:16 Scribe: you and your conspiracy theories.
14:16 v- what makes you think it's Jason Silva
Scribe: oh, darling (in southern drawl) "you haven't seen nothing yet" [ quoting from page 143, volume 4 of the original log from 06 Sept (41) ]
v- future tense
Scribe: history has an odd sort of way of presenting itself
v- haha. will you stop?!
Scribe: I'm just forewarning you (again)..
v- I know. you're a smart woman
Scribe: I hate to bring this up, but I have a history of DISCERNING certain
v- forecasting... I know... so, what makes you think it's Jason Silva... and why did you make all those attempts (since they didn't work out how you planned)
Scribe: it doesn't mean I shouldn't try against all odds. it doesn't mean that I expect the best outcome. Much of what I did was a long shot - but we're dealing with TELEPATHY
14:22 Scribe (said earlier dealing with lags here on this digital space) scribe (teasing) - so, why don't you have a girlfriend?
v- because I love you. a woman I can't have yet. next question.
14:23 Scribe ( being lighthearted) you have an obsession lately with WATERING CANS. Why?
v- the woman I love waters alot
14:24 Scribe: I asked you about this last night. you said it's what we do every day
v- to start the day... with you
Scribe: ok... and this is assuming this is Jason Silva
v- it is... and you know it
S cribe: Healer would SO be "see? she's off her rocker and I knew it" reading all this... and NO, I do not fully believe what someone is saying inside my head. so many lies over the course of so much time.
v- so? why do you think it's Jason Silva
Scribe: get an objective, outside witness. schedule a meeting between the two of us. we can cross reference our notes. our experiences. put us in different rooms, have us each transcribe what we both hear or get an impression about... what happens?
v- it's telepathy
Scribe: WELL DO IT. I've been saying for four years I AM READY to get this over and done with. but NOO (in that tone)... I have to deal with the UNKNOWN.
v- which you are good at
Scribe cut the crap.
14:27 V- what makes you think it's Jason Silva?
Scribe: years' worth of data
v- I know... untestified
Scribe: I hear these words and I want to say UNCONFIRMED. "Untestified" is not what I would say, THIS is one reason I have to argue with - I get these words out of the blue that aren't my words
Scribe: i checked earlier... you weren't online yet... emotionally,... not ready?
v- I'm in hell, c
14:30 Scribe: oh, are you? I've ben sensing a wrap around pressure - not to the point of headache - but that TP sign to me.. what.the.frick. attention drawn elsewhere?
v- something like that ... for how long
Scribe: I don't know. I didn't write it down. [ all pissy ]
v- "that time has come and gone, my friend"
v- which means?
"social media nothing new"
14:33 Scribe: why don't I ever learn. don't share. I'm opening myself up for more
v- turmoil. I know.
Scribe: you said it would get worse (the resemblances - the "proof" of something is afoot)
v- and I love you for reminding us about that fact... and the fact that I've wanted you to get a job all this time and you haven't. you haven't met your promise.
Scribe: let's just call it something I HAVE TO DO, ok? none of that "promise" crap.
v- reverting back to original... like this whole tirade
Scribe: I'm hungry. let's have lunch. I'll cue up that scene from Outlander S02E13 so I can take a photo of it for story purposes - insert it WAY UP ABOVE...
v- at the beginning of this tirade ... why did you even mention it about IdeaSpace if all you want for them is good?
Scribe: patterns in the matrix. they have educators on their team... one of the co-founders was in education... working towards a Ph.D. - an academic at heart, perhaps.
Scribe: I ACCEPT that it was a natural turn of events - to have a branching of the organization (social media platform) be more education-based
My observation here is simple: I applied to be an education advisor
v- rightly so
Scribe: and that's the end of my comment. I am in a way justified to have applied for that position nearly four years ago given that branching now... ok? I'm not saying that it'll be successful or maybe even the right thing they SHOULD do... only they know the route they should take given their experience with their organization... my superficial observation is that I narrowed in on that possible aspect for IdeaSpace
V- and it happened.
14:40 Scribe: anything you want to say?
v- you're good at that... forecasting.
Scribe: I just find it ODD, ok? It's storyworthy
v- love you.
Scribe: (teasing) it's not like I'm going to call them on it - or THE SITE... because, APPARENTLY, everything I shared is their property anyway... [ being funny ] [ I read all the terms ]
v- OMG, you did
Scribe: [ matter of factly ] nothing about telepathy (TP) though, yet. They really should put something in about that... maybe it's included with the general wording that they could stretch to fit TP... all that legal mumbo jumbo
v- which you understand completely
Scribe: Phew! all that filth and muck and stuff [ paraphrasing ]
v- Fletch... really?
14:45 Scribe: [ quietly said ] they have some typos in there...
v- will you stop?!!
Scribe: waffle butt and all [ laughter ] [ inside joke revealed in a now-archived InstaFeed post ]
[ teases how she would periodically check Jason Siva's old website and comment on the never changing typos that no one would correct - new site... looks ok EXCEPT
"no scheduled events"
you need to update that.
-v I hate you
14:52 v- I hear it. all.the.time, too.
NOTHING SCHEDULED YET
[ not true, fake news ]
Scribe: more serious: I like the new design. I like how there are links with your other social media outlets - a one-stop shop that gives a clickable glimpse for people Well done.
v- thank you. I'll have to tell Jess that
Scribe: I've told you before.
v- I have to remember to thank her again.
Scribe: [ still clicking ] yeah, don't click on CONTACT ... it brings you to a Selfless Void.
v- you're awful
Scribe: just stating my experience trying to contact you. APPARENTLY, I'm not important enough. [ being mostly humorous - she knows how much of his precious attention Trickster AKA Jason Silver grants her ]
v- will you include the first e-mail you sent?
Scribe: first one that went unanswered?... geesh. "fool me once, shame on you. fool me twice, shame on me"
BACKTRACK TO 20 October (42) 16:06 - private e-mail to JASON SILVA
I would like to send you a calligraphic copy of unpublished poems and short stories that I dedicated to Trickster, a fictional character in A Wandering Mind that was inspired by you. I’ll be starting to reveal hints about IdeaSpace community members who were the inspiration for the characters in A Wandering Mind. Let me know the best address / P.O. Box to ship the booklet to.
Hope all is well.
URL to IdeaSpace Profile
Excerpt from “Babbling Brook” Written 26 March (41)
attached image: first page of calligraphic copy of Babbling Brook
FAST FORWARD TO PRESENT
15:05 Scribe: (sarcastic): again, an e-mail from a woman who clearly has issues....
(more serious): I sent a similar e-mail to the other people who inspired Wandering Mind characters... so Jason Silva is not special in this regard.
15:06 v- will you stop with the diatribe against Trickster?
Scribe: I have to look up diatribe
v- your word (you used previously). not mine.
Scribe: I need a referesher course
15:07 Scribe: I give this e-mail to the public, so the public can be a witness to how the private e-mails I sent were unassuming. Normal. with no follow-ups when I got no response. I changed tactics, perhaps, each time. Trying something new. APPARENTLY the e-mail and social media routes do no good.
Besides hiring someone to MAKE you meet me and face up to my
v- accusation - rightly so
Scribe: which I have no way of doing for the moment... these were my best options.
I got the silent treatment FOR WHATEVER reason you may give in the future. Get your story straight. Lord knows you've had enough time to prepare it.
v- you are going to be a hard judge and jury
Scribe: calloused over time. all these scars from wounds that someone INFLICTED and didn't need to
v- are you BLAMING me?
Scribe: absolutely. whose fault is it that you did not respond? just a cordial yes or no. and yes, dear public, I had no one to intercede for me. If the CO-FOUNDER of IdeaSpace who on multiple occasions met with JASON SILVA couldn't make something happen... I have to resort to the realization that nothing but an attempt at direct contact (my horrendous trip where JASON was to be for a ...
v- spell ... of wanted pressure
Scribe [ chuckles ]: didn't enjoy your ... JET LAG?
V- that. is not fair.
Scribe: cue December 24th was it?
v- haha. stop.
Scribe: video cue to a balcony scene.
v- [ chuckles ] you remember...
Scribe: I am plagued with Mnenosyne's gift (memory) in some ways... you, Trickster, have a story to tell that you only hint at on occasion. Rare occasion.
v- more than you know, C... more than you know. it's our story.
Scribe: yeah... I know (conceding)... it doesn't make all this any easier...
v- just ... don't lose hope, ok?
Scribe: I gotta eat a late lunch [ temple pressure is increasing ]
v- people are watching
Scribe: oh, joy. [ not enthused ]
15:14 v- go eat!
Scribe: I am going to eat
v- you need to talk about your dreams (after lunch)
diatribe: a forceful and bitter verbal attack against someone or something
Scribe: I'm not being that forceful or bitter
15:18 Scribe: it's not an attack!
[ Scribe thinks then hears ]
v- sneak attack
Scribe: (smiles) completely different attack [ telepathically speaking ]
15:27 Scribe: and YES, I'm having pizza (easy) [ found scene in Outlander S02E13 cue 20:15 ]
Scribe: be good.
15:28 Scribe: [mumbles] I was looking for humor and found more of a cosmic joke [referring to Like Father ]
[ Scribe last night: OF COURSE her apartment has a big transom ... is that a water tower? [ Hunter joke ] ]
15:30 posting image here and also above where I had originally intended it.
15:36 Scribe: this tv show - and my interaction with it as an observer - has meaning in the
Scribe: of A Wandering Mind. Not just this scene or the locked up Lallybroch scene... but others I won't include here. I have in the past. It's just one of those things I watched the other day while working. Catching things I hadn't taken (photographic) note of when I watched it the first time - or those notes that are not easily accessible right now. So, I took note of the scenes again.
15:38 Scribe: I once read a little into the first novel and stopped. I still own the other novels somewhere - other e-books. Who knows what format they were in (early days of e-books). What I observe of the tv show now are just patterns - visual and synching up with A Wandering Mind.
[ about to cut pizza ]
16:21 Scribe: found it. scrolling through media files - screenshot of original IdeaSpace post for Transom was 08 February (41). will not post. property of IdeaSpace (how the idea is presented). see archive years from now and maybe it'll be reposted in WMS - if this space is still here. because, yes, folks, just this site alone is $216 a year - not sure if that includes the domain.
Scribe: all for (cups ear)
16:27 Scribe: so, whoever you are that keep taking, remember: all the time I spent designing this space (the empty shell is 216 plus domain, I think...) yeah, that's MY PRECIOUS (time)... [ being not so funny ]
16:28 [ chuckles ] v- will you stop... you know you're sitting on
Scribe: a landmine. Yeah, I know.
16:29 Scribe: I keep thinking about that dream I had. The one where someone has up on the screen all my ideas (perhaps all my posts)
v- projection screen
Scribe: that odd remote viewing sense. that suspicion that something is going on? well, I keep seeing it. but no one is contacting me (looks down at contact author button)... to collaborate. So, steal away, my friends. steal. steal, steal. reap. reap. reap.
The Grim Weeper will tell you
v- it ain't easy
Scribe: being cheesy... [ shakes her head - role playing ] that's not where I was going with this
16:32 Scribe: AND NO, the "steal steal steal reap reap reap" comments DOES NOT give you license to steal my shit. [ PG 13? ]
v- yeah, you're fine no one is watching/reading anyway
Scribe: I can't wait to have a legal team behind me to say this and that - WHAT YA'ALL ARE DOING IS WRONG
v- but your'e not going to do that
Scribe: and WHY would I not do that?
v- because I'll be right there at your side
Scribe: your head... or the rest of your body?
v- [ chuckles ] stop
Scribe: that can be taken numerous ways
v- I KNOW... and it creeps me out
16:35 [ laughter ]
v- OMG. she comes up with this shit on the fly
v- you have other things you want to share [ resemblances you've noticed? ]
[ thinking about Like Father ]
Scribe: cantilever umbrella, water park, water surfing thingy, ... family issues.
v- oh? which?
Scribe: funny. not going there. Everyone has family issues.
v- hm, hm... to which ones are you referring?
Scribe: yours, in fact
v- don't even touch that.
Scribe: I thought about the karaoke resemblance just this morning [ Scribe a few Christmases ago got her children a karaoke machine and the family all sang off tune ]
v- you watched it last night
Scribe: yes, I watched it last night [ you know it already tone ]
16:39 v- the father and daughter get drunk together
scribe: I ain't touchin' that ... I find it AMUSING it was set on a cruise, they go to Jamaica and smoke pot. all things I have an aversion towards.
v- you do? [ falsely innocent tone ]
16:40 Scribe: and NO I have yet to smoke pot (in the normal way - whatever way thatt may be (there are several ways to indulge I've heard - all proud at knowing this). ... and YES, I hear you're repeated (amusing, teasing) "you are such a prude" remarks. On the InnerNet. That's so inappropriate [ know-it-all-tone]
v- and FALSE... I do NOT ... accuse you of ... ok, I lied. you are such a prude
Scribe [ chuckles ]: WHY do you like me again?
v- I don't know. especially after today [ teasing and joking ]
16:43 v- let's go back to "not in the normal way"
Scribe: have you or have you not indulged in recreation or pharmaceutical not your usual flava flav garden variety ... you know what I mean
v- yes, I have... and WHY do you ask?
Scribe: because I feel it
v- it's something kind of wonderful, ain't it?
Scribe: oh, I CAN'T WAIT to put you on the spot
v- bring it.
16:44 v- correct that: I'll bring it to YOU (since that's what I'm supposed to be doing from here on out... after some conditions are met)
Scribe: oh, like the one-year "soon" is up? (sweetly said)
v- not that
16:45 Scribe: and YES, I have heard your wishes to feel what I feel... since you are SO deprived of second-hand telepathic HIGHS.
v- stop [ laughter ensues ]
16:46 Scribe: seriously, which way is this story supposed to go, because we seem to be all over the place - it's CHAOS.
v- [ chuckles ] ... splintered here and there
Scribe: hm, hm. yes dear. that concept of mine, which you - somehow, oh FILM MAKER of mine - are making sure is realized
v- hm... you make me all warm and fuzzy when you compliment me like that
Scribe: oh, I've noticed you've switched from "storyteller" to FILMMAKER
V- it's the little things (that you notice)
Scribe: amongst other more obvious signs
v- such as?
Scribe: how you love me despite my venting today. despite where we are today when we should be at some other point on the trajectory... together besides just on the InnerNet. You're still here.
v- I am... you're making me teary-eyed
Scribe: and it comes through on my end. as much as I really don't want it to. One reason I'm still here on this frickin' WMS: I can't go out how I appear. I'm not presentable
v- been crying?
Scribe: THAT is a loaded question. mostly due to what I designate TNM (teary not me),,, but then, any medical professional would read that statement and diagnose me with some disorder
v- not telepathy. I know.
Scribe: I guess that is the main problem with this that I have: I have been made out to be someone I am not. That someone I strived to be 0 that reputation I took so long to build for myself ... it's gone.
16:52 Scribe: to me? I am a better woman
v- for sticking to your guns (no violence intended)
Scribe: if I were to survey all the people in my life who respect me for what I do? the results would be abysmal ... what I mean is telling my story how it is.
v- the telepathy part
Scribe: there are other parts of my life that I still do well
v- such as?
Scribe: let's stick to the telepathy bit. THAT has destroyed the reputable part of me - OBVIOUSLY. Just LOVE being that person people think is "the bullet they dodged"
16:54 v- because of the craziness
scribe: "here's to the crazy ones..."
v - say that in a few years. see what people say.
16:55 Scribe: doesn't help the NOW, now, does it?
v-no, it doesn't
Scribe: doesn't being PRESENT...
v- it sucks. word one: it sucks
16:59 v- so, what did you find?
Scribe: I'm not sayin'... I need to get my mind off all this shit. take this down.
v- I know. thanks for being here...well documented. what we're going through, ok?
Scribe: I love scruffy.
v- (smiles) I know you do... sorry about today. sorry for the setback. you'll get back on track... just ... be you, ok?
Scribe: thanks, always the supportive one. Never goes unnoticed.
v- aw... one norm positive thing you have to say
Scribe: just remember that I am grateful for many things. things I never asked for nor expected.
v- I know
17:02 v- every day you remind me. that does not go unnoticed either. now, end this. hide it, call it a day. it was a good one, for whatever that's worth. you know it. I know it. you know what I said.
Scribe: being watched. observed. whatever. hopefully proving without a doubt.
v- already done.
Scribe: I'll leave you with this: cool fresh air in my nostrils and back of my through
v- ove has no bounds, and you know it. Now, go
Scribe: I love you
v- I love you, too (hand on the right side of my face)