DAY 1883

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00:29 awake

———

fire antsy toes and soles

01:16

uncomfortable

V- and you know why

C- no, I don’t 

01:35

02:20 posting

—-

04:02 c- how’s that treatin’ ya?… still here🎶

V- you’re going to do you’re Contrarian thing again, aren’t ya?

04:03 c- yuP

04:03 c- wishful hopeful positive thinking DOES NO GOOD. Trust me: i’ve Had 1883 days to maneuver them in and they haven’t changed my life for the better

hundreds of love stories and love poems.

Nothing.

04;04

v/ (chuckling) stop

c- oh…

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04:06: so, I should think positive thoughts and my money problems will go POOF!

c- hm-hm … ain’t believin’ that koolaid (disclosure : this is in no way anything against the brand Koolaid … just sayin’)

04:08 v- you really don’t Get it

c- NO, YOU don’t get it. Block me from your thoughts

v- no, I don’t want to

c- over and over again

v- sorry for your money problems,c

c- it’s your fault (being mostly funny)

04:09 v- I know

v- it’s a no-win situation with you

c- pretty much … LOOK : what people need to realize is

I WAS OPTIMISTIC AND HOPEFUL for YEARS of this

v- yeah, I know

c- where’s that get me?

v- in the poor house

04:11 c- lesson learned. Don’t Believe in JS’s KOOLAID.

v-FINE

C- (mumbles) five years

v- almost five years

c- i’m ROUNDING … of recording every little meme or quote he posts

v- it’s annoying

c- yes, it is

04:12 c- I have a little extra time. Back to sleep.

Frickin’ body rhythm is all jacked up because of you

v- yeah, I know … sorry

c-how’d you sleep?

v- not good

04:13

—-

alarm

(snooze) (snooze)

05:12 from page 168 of the InnerNet travelogue 17 July 2014

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05:13 c- let’s apply this saying to as many things as possible today (Being all superficially cheerful)

v- (chuckles) you won’t stop … one is going to be woo

c- GOOD ANSWER! (in the Hallmark Elf recorded voice)

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05:17 v- it’s like mad libs

c- yes, but you record your vocal answers (instead of writing down words in blanks) … then the elf spews them back into a funny nonsensical story

05:19

—-

biking to bus stop

C- I hate humidity …

06:51 bus headed downtown

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06:55 c- ah, censoring again, BookBurner?

v- you would

06:56 c- mm-mm.. so how does one determine the most relevant?

C: HACKER.

v- hm-hm

06:57 v- how’s the bus?

c- all the passengers as I go down the aisle

”please don’t sit next to me …”

DRIP, DRIP (sweaty)

c- fine. UNSECURED (network), BABY.

v- hm-hm … how’s debt?

c- splendiforous, I feel my credit score bottoming out.

v- (chuckling) stop.

c- it’s a joke. As I was minddiscussing / reflecting about last night on the bike ride home : as soon as I have bookoo funds?

the bankers will be salivating …

”how may we help you?”

v- I know, it’s a joke

c- that credit score? Ain’t gonna matter one iota.

v- I know

c- a little over a month

v- of hell … I know

c- (sadly funny) : at least I don’t get the non stop robo calls

v- because you have no cell service

07:01 c- noPe.

07:01 c- gah, the silence is glorious

v- they can find you in other ways

c- oh, I am well aware. If they want their damn money they can wait and rack up the fees in the meantime, which I will pay. They are ever richer for it.

It’s the ever constant juggling of my life

i don’t have money

to get me to where I need to go (financially solvent)

i have to borrow

v- on credit

c- they earn money … I survive and invest in my present/ future

v- it’s called living

c- at least I have a light at the end of this dark frickin’ tunnel

v- you’re not worried?

c- no… I am not. I’ve been through hell… and i’ve Been reflecting on ..

v- on what you’ve given people

c- here’s a part of my story that no one has heard about

c- my husband and I were in a lot of debt from several moves due to his work, and unfortunate circumstances

v- he got laid off

c- you go into debt fast .. we survived …

c- over the years …

v- he made money

c- if it were “my money?” Every bonus would have been to pay off debt

c- what did I do when I moved out in 2018?

v- you paid off most of your debt

c- OUR DEBT. Because even though in my name ?

v- it was a joint life

c- so, I keep encouraging him to do this and that to lower interest rates …

v- omg…

c- who was the one who ALWAYS initiated lowering rates (on mortgage, unsecured debt / credit cards)

v- you

07:06 c- again, OUR DEBT … that never changed … I KNEW that as soon as I moved out and we separated our finances?

v- he’d be forced to see the debt

c- HE’D have one take care of it for a change … and when you take care of your own budget and finances?

v- omg

c- it wasn’t me … you know the situation

v- he’d bite your head off

c- every,time.i’d.talk.sensible.budgeting

c- first advice to my daughters will be

v- always keep a separate bank account

c- for the first time in decades I had my own checking (not joint ) account … July 20, 2017

v- because you had to pay for bills

c- he would spend money like we didn’t have a lot of bills to pay and I WAS ALWAYS RUNNING AROUND trying to make ends meet

v- and he made enough money

c- I was run ragged

so, I move out, our finances are separate. I took half our debt (In my name, but still)

v- you had no regular job

c- used my life savings to start a separate household, pay off debt, bought a car , started a business

v- and the money ran out

c- FAST. He has NO IDEA how much grief I spared him by not forcing him to sell the house

v- and split the proceeds

c- so; he is practically debt free right now

MY CHARITY. My good will, my forecasting : that when we were divorced would be when he would FINALLY

V- be budget wise

c- let’s not stretch that too far ..

v- be good (chuckling)

c- anyway, money is relative

“he can afford it”

v- but he can’t

07:21 (at next bus stop)

c- my daughter looked at me the other day and said: you know, Mom, I start college in four years

c- I looked at her and said: who is the one who is in charge of your college funds?

v- omg… you did not

c- they know Mom doesn’t have much money right now. I can’t buy anything but essentials right now…

so, I followed that up by saying : Dad should start putting money into that fund, too.

v- haha . You did:

c- I so did. I know what she was saying. I also teased her and looked straight into her eyes and said

“but you’re going to get a full scholarship wherever you choose to go to school, right?”

C- I tease my children ruthlessly. They get my humor.

v- they’re concerned

c- of course they’re concerned. EVERYONE is concerned about me my finances and who I can’t do (right now)

🙄

07:25

07:29 (on last bus)

c- so, we were horrible life partners when trying to handle our finances

v- agreed

c- that wasn’t the only thing

v- oh?

c- will you stop. He is so much more RELEVANT in my life right now than you could ever hope to be … he’s a good man… which is a FAR CRY from what I’ve experienced with this KIND ARTIST everyone assumes you are and I never see any results from him

v- in your way

c- arms crossed. RELEVANT.

v- ALRIGHT.

C- ART doesn’t keep the roof over my children or my heads

v- no, it doesn’t

c- ART doesn’t pay most of the bills … of not for Crafty Scribe’s few hundred dollars here and there, this summer (which I have had to do without for the past few weeks)… I would not have survived.

v- agreed

c- it was my gas and food money

v- when there wasn’t any other money

c- you know I can’t buy a discounted bus pass (week / month ) without a credit or debit card? They (the vending machines) don’t accept cash.

07:34 Inconvenience factor .. for people who are tied to offices working all day during normal business hours?

who have to take UNPAID time off to do errands ?

it’s a vicious downward spiral that is EXTREMELY inconvenient for people whose lives are already inconvenient

07:35

c- so, keep shooting those videos of woo

that’ll help solve society’s biggest issues

v- ___

c- i’m A serious woman. I have a dark sense of humor

v- that STINGS

c- PLEASE there are so many other GOOD THINGS that Rachel or any woman could be doing with their lives and

she chooses higher society ENABLING.

07:37 v- will you be nice. Geesh.

c- everyone has to make a living, right?

c- so… what good is she doing again? I’m lost.

The empowerment of women?

what exactly is it?

How is she helping the masses of women again?

or … is she just helping those women who can afford her services that she is well compensated for and that Jason Silva supports with his mere presence and tagging.

v- WILL YOU BE GOOD

C- again, what is that message you are sending?

v- self-serving

c- ah, got it.

07:39 c- nice way to reach out to a wider audience

v- will you be good

c- I AM SORRY. I have a burr up my butt and I truly don’t understand why you waste so much of your time on a small niche.

v- (chuckling) be good … man, you’re awful

c- how’s cameo?

v- will you be good 🙄

c: so… what you’re saying is your POPULARITY … isn’t “all that”

v- (chuckling) I know what you’re getting at

c- I can show you stats

v- be nice

07:41

DANG! You’re down even more than I last checked …

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so much for 100s of thousands of followers

v- it’s all relative

c- hm-hm …

07:44 c- I am ruthless in my teasing

v- I know you are … and I take it well

07:44

[ checks cameo for the first time ]

HAHA… $50?!? Geesh. Ego inflation alert! Ego inflation alert!

v- you are awful

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07:47 (Teasing) ManWhoor

v- (chuckling) you would

c- pseudocelebrities ( shakes her head )

07:48 c- how many people actually sign up for that?

v- not many

c- I didn’t think they would … geesh. Please tell me Rachel advised you that that might not get you anywhere

v- haha . STOP.

07:48

being HAUGHTY : two degrees of separation 🎶

v- (chuckling) stop

c/ oh, it just has to bother some people that I am two calls away from Tim Cook

v- it bothers me royally

c- funny, how I haven’t called in any of those favors … YET.

v- oh, you would

c- someone who was in our wedding 🎶

v/ oh, I know

c (chuckling)

07:56

(Sense : lighthearted laughter)

c- you know i’m Not lying

v- I know you’re not

07:58

—-

08:04 at work; only J the biller is here

08:22 c- it’s the little things. I arrived at work just before it started raining (under a roofline staying dry)

v- but sweaty

c- it is humid + exercise = sweaty

[ working ]

—-

[ training ]

SAHB

09:51

on and off : SAHB

10:10

—-

c- I really think you and Rachel should be open and honest about your sex life

v- oh, you would

c- many know you already live together (being ornery because so much can be ASSUMED even though it may not be the case)

v- BE GOOD

C- lived with my ex for years …

v- and never had sex

c- not even romantically involved

v (soft chuckle) stop

c- SO MANY ASSUMPTIONS

V- so little talk

c- hm-hm… INQUIRING MINDS WANT TO KNOW

12:38 v- ENTRAPMENT!

c- hm-hm .. oh, but you’ll be open and honest and pure and truthful

v- unambiguous … got it

12:38

12:40 v- you were doing research …

c- yes. I hate that you hear everything I do.

V- for eZ?

c- yes

v- oh, but why?

c- unfinished BUSINESS.

v- oh, you would

12:42 c- hm. I did some checking on what others were doing 🙄

v- sex site

c- come on, didn’t you know? Sex is an art form.

v- oh, you would.

c- so… unimpressed

v- with this site?

c- yah. So … IDK… blah.

v- ok…

c- could be better 🤷‍♀️ (Shrugs shoulders)

12:43 c- but, hey, if you can get $$$ for practically nothing

v- have at it… you have ideas

c- more … tasteful ones .. yes

v- oh, lord

c- I know (sigh) … i have a puritanical bent to me

12:44

—-

SAHB

13:06

13:09

[ working ]

v- sorry

c- whatever. Five years of this shit.

13:09

—-

SAHB

sense : I feel off (interpretation? A high, an unusual, uncomfotable )

13:47

13:48 v- just put gastrointestinal

c- NOT ME

V- no, not you

c- don’t

v- you feel ill

c- yes, I feel ill

you want to know why?

EVERY SAHB.

EVERY uncomfortable

v- you feel raped. Understood.

c- for five years now I’ve been sensing something I shouldn’t.

13:50

c- APOLOGIES, whoever or whatever this is

v- is not a picnic

c- and, seriously ?

women frolicking … a bunch of women hanging out together

c- what message is that?

c- seriously. how is that changing the world?

v- it’s not

c- i’m am frustrated at the power you have to make a difference and THAT is what is more important

v- no, it’s not

c- I sense a silky warm UNCOMFORTABLE

SLEEZY coming onto to me sense

and I SWEAR if it goes on for any duration of time

I WILL PROTEST

13:53

c- THIS IS NOT ALRIGHT

13:53

blood coursing

c- seriously. What the fuck is this?!?

v- I know how upset you are

c- my bodymind has been hijacked and someone doesn’t give a shit.

13:56 c- yeah, just take me along for the ride.

v- rape you

c- I DO NOT CONSENT

13:56 c- you see EVERY DETAIL ? Not just the ones closer to when R + J post shit together

BUT ALL THE TIMESTAMPED DATA

I WANT AN ANSWER.

c- I WANT AN ANSWER for what

HAS RUINED my life

v: OMG .. I’m sorry

13:57

[ chatting with P at the picnic table … argh the resolution specialist - the veteran biller - just gave 2 weeks notice 😞 ]

c- so… blind leading the blind

v- yuP

14:07

[ reading email ]

14:08 v- I am in hell right now .. just so you know

c- hm-hm.

It’s apparent by what you share that you are suffering 🙄

just some day be honest

be that whole person people think you are

14:09 c- you’ve hidden this

—-

v- you ok?

14:12 c- I don’t want to be feeling this shit

it wears me down EVERY DAY

V- for five years, I know.

14:13 c- and. Good, KIND ARTIST never says yes or no just to at least give me peace?

c- yes, i’m A little bit pissed

c- I deserve happiness

AND YOU TOOK THAT FROM ME.

14:14

14:17

c- do you think I want to feel that shit?

v- no, I know you don’t

REMEMBER that when you and Rachel get served.

14:18

C- you better hope that that timestamp on that video

doesn’t correspond to ANY alteration in my state.

SAHB

heartwarming

wake up time

energy drain

lightheadedness

strange uncomfortable sense

drugged feeling

ETC

c- DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT I DO NOT CONSENT?

v- yeah, I understand

14:20

14:21 I have been ABUNDANTLY clear to how I do not want Rachel Rossitto affecting my bodymind via Jason Silva in any way. this case will be the first of its kind

v- hard to prove

c- oh?

C- and how difficult will it be when you and whoever have to provide metadataed data and turn it over to analyze possible connections?

THAT I AM UNAWARE OF to date

but I sensed it

14:23

c- I should have NO KNOWLEDGE of that metadata - when - the exact time - when something was recorded, captured…

v- f**k I know

c- AND YOU KNOW SOMETHING WILL BE PROVEN

V- yeah, I know

c- when push comes to shove

14:25 SAHB

[ training ]

14:32 SAHB

[ pouring rain … an offer to take me home

c- gotta love the smoking Jew ]

14:48

SAHB

sternoclavicular warmth

I FEEL OFF

vaginal soft sense

14:51

I DO NOT WANT TO SENSE THIS

14:51

14:53 c- why do you think I’ve been posting all my sensations that are incoming - those I have to experience … all without ANY EXPLANATION?

v- yet

14:54

c- and you wonder why I get so pissed?

I am perpetually pissed

14:55

INAPPROPRIATE TOUCHING

V- via unusual sources

c- you tell me … would a girlfriend of a guy want to be fondled awake?

v- no

c- I DON’T WANT YO FEEL THAT SHIT

15:00 c- f***king get a clue about how serious this is

c- I am NOT delusional

v- you’re distressed

15:01 c- I don’t care WHEN it was

I don’t want to be feeling it

HOWEVER it comes down the line

I DO NOT CONSENT

V- to inappropriate touching . Got it.

15:24

c- I felt UNCOMFORTABLE this morning. You know EXACTLY why I feel out of sorts … the incident right around 1:35 am my time …

THAT disturbs me..

v- you feel violated

c- on a daily basis

[ working ]

15:26 cheekbone pressure

[ working ]

16:05 SAHB

a bit drowsy

—-

16:07

c- why do I have to endure this?!?

c- why do I have to sense EVERY LITTLE THING?!?

c- and what is it I get?

disturbance

trauma

a man who is SUPPOSED to be kind

c- just go ahead and walk all over my life as if it didn’t matter

THIS IS THE SIGN of a sadistic pig

16:09 c- THAT’s NOT love

that is a man who disregards the safety of women

of ANY human being

and I am supposed to keep taking HIT after HIT?!

man does NOTHING (to make this better)

but I continue to suffer?

And you wonder why I am so critical of a woman who is supposed to be for the EMPOWERMENT of women

when she continues to be the cause of the rape of one

c- what is wrong with this picture ??

16:11

C- I am going to keep screaming until it sinks in

until

CLAIM AFTER CLAIM

hits someone’s Desk

C- and someone starts asking

“why did someone not do something about this ?!? (Sooner)?

16:12 c- that is what I am facing … against all odds because I have to do it alone

c- this mf HURTS me

this woman goes ALONG with it?

it is NOT a matter of their love

it is about the ABUSE they continue to inflict on another because of that … INTERACTION between the two of them

THAT I SENSE

16:13

—-

16:16 c- I did NOT agree to this - EVER.

C- you think I’m the unstable one?

what about the man who may very well be connected to me.. and KNEW about how this harmed me?

16:17 c- how long has it been now?

16:17

16:19 c- don’t DO THAT

16:20 SAHB

16:21 c- I know what I claim is off the charts - undiagnosable in normal ways … but if there is ANYTHING to my story

v- we’ll talk

c- you know darn well it is BEYOND just talking to me about now

v- panel. Got it.

C- or worse.

16:22

C- if you can sense me?

How would you feel if I stated dating someone

V- i’d Be ok with it

c- oh? And if you felt me having sex?

v- that’d be different

c- oh? What’s to stop me right now?

16:24 c- what in the whole scheme of things AS I SEE it Right now … is to stop me from dating and having sex with a partner, hm?

v- nothing

16:24

16:25 c- FIVE YEARS and no closer to making this right … you can understand how I see this

v- yeah I do

c- STOP DOING THAT

16:26

16:33 SAHB

c- it’s not that I don’t Want you to have a happy life … that’s not it at all … it’s that THAT? Affects MY Life

v- sensorially

c- and you IGNORE that basic necessity for Freedom from ANY tie with you that I SHOULD HAVE

16:34 c- and THAT ? I can’t stand for

that is in blatant disregard for another human’s welfare

for which I will fight until I die

IT IS NOT RIGHT what you are doing

if there is ANY connection between us

16:36

16:38 heart warm

16:39 c- ANY sensation

v- is a violation

c- WHENEVER it happens

v- until we talk

c- DON’T DO THAT

16:39

16:41 c- I don’t want to be feeling this. I don’t want to be feeling this

v- I know you don’t

16:41

07:06 headed to bus stop …

17:12 c- DON’T DO THAT.

17:12 c- … and it’s raining.

17:13

17:14 headed downtown

v- no ride

c- it “cleared” momentarily … oh, well. Passing rain shower.

17:14 c- N was supposed to bring me home …

v- promises, promises

c- she is chaos

v- not with a capital C

c- no, that’s me.

c- sigh… she said I’d pick up the car “while she was away”

c- whatever the frick that means

17:15 c- hm-hm. AWESOME.

V- no credit

c- no Lyft.

17:16 AWESOME.

C- you had an obligation four + years ago

c- STOP THAT

17:16 c- f**king A. Every one of those when this connection is proven will be considered

harassment

c- that too

v- prove it

17:17

c- as I was saying on my bike to the bus terminal : you could have made my life easier

less suffering

c- but instead?

you made my life

more difficult

sad

and one in which I am a slave to these sensations

you took away my happiness and freedom

it is a human rights violation

THE ONE PERSON on the planet that i thought would be one of THE LAST PEOPLE to make another human being suffer like this ?

is Jason Silva

Rachel Rossitto

some day you will understand

you will be placed in a very difficult position

to explain everything you did

v- that could have been done better

c- YOU RAPED me continuously - sensorially - and you think that’s OK?

17:20 WAKE UP.

we already live in a world that will DEMAND that you explain yourselves

when you were notified

again and again

about the harm

v- inflicted

17:21 c- you made my life so much more difficult

if I have to?

i’ll gather all my notes

side by side

correlate

and prepare

17:21 v- you won’t have to

c- no, I have a feeling I have a lot of work ahead of me no matter what

c- I was so nice for so many years

and now?

I HAVE THIS to accuse you both of

17:22

c- you may see it a different way

but without clear and specific direct communication?

V- normal channels

c- you have caused me pain experientially over and over again

as if it were physical abuse

an assault not yet defined

but there will be a legal code after I am done with proving this

17:24 c- you CANNOT continue to live as if your actions had no effect

because if I sense the spin?

if you knew about it

if you profited in any way

if ANYONE profited in anyway from my suffering?

v- it’s slavery

c- you took a basic human right away from me

v- then prove it .. will you?

c- you have given me plenty of evidence … plenty to persuade people that there is definitely something suspicious going on

and if ANYONE suspects you?

that is the opening

and then? They force a legal order on you

v- if it gets that far

17:27 c- given my experience?

it’ll go that far. I will once again have to initiate to get it done

17:27 c- heaven forbid Jason Silva KIND ARTIST would do the right thing after pulling inspiration from a single source, never contacting her after five + years … and passing it off as his own content

getting paying gigs because of it

showing those videos during his PAID ENGAGEMENTS

17:29

—-

18:03 on way to burbs, sunny, bike is soaked, though 😞

v- WiFi works, though

c- UNSECURED network, mf.

v- yeah, I get that

—-

one of the “you might be interested in” IG search page gallery ..

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V- potty time, I know

c- will a rolling transcript 🙄 so TP

v- haha. Stop.

c- I Haven’t gotten to this episode yet

v- you got to the one where they’re tied up together?

c- yes

18:06

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VS Case File - request metadata

far from a good feeling when I feel like someone not only drugged me but raped me.

19:49 c- do you see the smiling faces?

when there may be someone quantum entangled and forced against her will to feel things?

If a quantum entangled state is proven to exist between JS & CG, scenes like these will be played over and over again to demonstrate the blatant disregard for another’s life and well-being.

Pay attention to all the shifts in sensation that I report day after day. All the discomfort.

all the interruptions into my normal life.

They correspond to SOMETHING.

NOT just this video that I share to illustrate how these two individuals continue to act as if nothing was wrong with what they do.

if I am not connected (tele(m)pathically)?

fine.

then deny it to me personally discounting and disproving any evidence of a suspected link that I provide.

19:54

c- if there IS a link?

JS + RR will need to explain themselves and their behavior.

if they were on drugs? There were witnesses.

If I SENSED any drug effects (telepathically / nonlocal trasference)?

I was drugged against my will.

19:55

sleepy

20:39

sleepy

20:52