DAY 1833

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DAY 1833 and still no contact via normal channels (e-mail, text, DM, phone call, mail, in-person) - still no peace (of mind / body ) in my life

thus post demonstrates the range of everyday sensorial distractions I face at this point.

What does ZERO DEPTH mean?

I find it extremely superficial for Jason Silva to act one way to the general public and then, on the other hand, treat another individual as if she were a No one to him - if I am no one to him, then say as much… or maybe the silence & absence are my answer? : I am a No one to him…

if this is a mindbody connection? not to come forward to me personally and privately just to let me know what is going on to let me know what kind of a connection it is (who we are to each other)…? I should know after five years of this shit.

KNOWING matters. Knowing would have helped me make better choices, having known exactly what the variables of my life were.

I have had to make choices based on what now has become five years of NOTHING… I have made moral decisions based on what now is Nothing.

My life has been affected because of whatever THIS is.

[ I wake up every 1-2 hours due to a self-diagnosed nonlocal source (suspect: Jason Silva) - I do it know what jars me awake, but in any case, my sleep is disrupted. I need my sleep before a long work day … ]

01:32 awake

02:56 awake

Cool fresh air pet back of throat

03:21 

04:39 awake 

[ disruptions while at work. More concerns. I continue to have no explanation for these continued sensations that interrupt my life ]

08:36 subtle temple pressure ( TP )

08:40

SAHB soft faux fur warm inner sense 

09:00 a bit more SAHB

09:08 making love sense (coming to me nonlocally)

C- you know I worry ... and you know why

09:19 soft wrap and eCaress [ I don’t know what this is & I try to not think what it could be … ]

10:22 ongoing subtle TP

Ecaress to full body inner chill

C- stop ... stop ...I am at work 

10:38

11:21 subtle TP cool fresh air

ecaress 

11:46

12:40 blood coursing 

12:46 drowsy

Taking lunch so I can get up and move around to shake off this fatigue

—-

subtle SAHB

13:04

cinnamony drowsy 

13:43

soft floofy sense [ making love sense - again, a concern, what is this that I am sensing?!? I am trying to not think what it could be (mindbody rape) : Distracting while I am trying to work ]

14:15

15:23 right ear high pitched ting (like a pressure change)

ongoing soft floofy high sense

15:49

SAHB subtle blood coursing

16:06

16:31

cinnamony slight cool upper back palate of mouth

—-

18:13 waiting in car - getting oil change for company car

still ongoing chillaxy liquidity

—-

on couch resting after a long day at work

subtle SAHB

cinnamony 

sleepy 

20:37

—-

21:32 in bed

Sleeping

22:44 awake 

22:45 heated. “Drug” heated 

[ I fall back asleep only to be awakened again at 00:35 DAY 1834 ]